Budite svom detetu ono što je vama trebalo kada ste bili dete. Be to your child what you needed to be when you were a child.
Kada bih sada rekla da podignu ruku svi koji još uvek nose traume iz detinjstva u sebi, mislim da bi sigurno vas 90% podiglo ruku.
Upravo o ovo me želim danas da pričam jer ako želimo da postanemo najbolja verzija sebe, moramo prvo da se izlečimo i nadjemo svoj MIR.
Jutros me je probudio zrak sunca koji me je grejao po licu. Odmah sam znala da dan źelim da provedem u prirodi, na vazduhu. Predložila sam ćerki da pozovemo njenu drugaricu i odemo na jezero. Tako smo i uradile. Nako domaće pite sa sirom koju smo doručkovale, krenule smo.
Nakon 10 minuta šetnje, pokupile smo ćerkinu drugaricu i brzim hodom nastavile ka obližnjem jezeru.
Ubrzo smo stigle. Dan je bio sunčan i prepun neke energije koja vas nosi. Voda je sijala pod zracima sunca a vetar blago treperio tek da nas podseti da je prisutan.
If I were to ask everyone who still carries childhood traumas to raise their hands, I think that 90% of you would raise your hands.
This is exactly what I want to talk about today, because if we want to become the best version of ourselves, we must first heal ourselves and find our PEACE.
This morning I was woken up by the sun's rays warming my face. I knew right away that I wanted to spend the day in nature, in the fresh air. I suggested to my daughter that we invite her friend and go to the lake. That's what we did. After the homemade pies with cheese that we had for breakfast, we started.
After a 10-minute walk, we picked up our daughter's friend and continued briskly towards the nearby lake.
We arrived soon. The day was sunny and full of some energy that carries you. The water shone under the rays of the sun and the wind gently flickered just to remind us that it was present.
Bila sam ok ali se kroz moje misli provlačio neki neprijatan miris detinjstva. Ne mislim na igru i druženje koje je tada bilo mnogo bogatije i prisutnije već odnosi medju nama decom i roditeljima. Uvek se vraćam na tu temu. Ne zato što želim sebe da mučim već zato da ne bih ponavljala istu grešku.
I was ok, but some unpleasant smell of my childhood was wafting through my thoughts. I don't mean the play and socializing that was much richer and more present then, but the relationships between us children and parents. I always come back to that topic. Not because I want to torture myself, but because I don't want to repeat the same mistake.
Mislim da je važno da osvestimo bol koja nam ne dopušta da se razvijamo već nam diktira pogrešan pravac ili oduzima snagu koja zarobljena u detinjstvu čeka na oslobodjenje. Na ovu temu me je najviše navela priča nekih mojih bliskih prijatelja koji se kao i mnogi vraćaju u prošlost. Muče se. Koliko puta ste hteli da razgovarate sa roditeljima koji su bili toksični u odnosu sa vama a oni su na to prevrtali očima jer se vi stalno vraćate u prošlost? Pa vraćate se jer želite da se otarasite toga što vas muči a oni vam nabacuju krivicu jer ne žele da prihvate odgovornost i suoče se sa problemom i krivicom.
I think it is important to become aware of the pain that does not allow us to develop but dictates the wrong direction or takes away the strength that is trapped in childhood waiting to be released. The story of some of my close friends who, like many others, go back in time led me to this topic. They are struggling. How many times have you wanted to talk to your parents who were toxic in their relationship with you and they rolled their eyes because you keep going back to the past? So you come back because you want to get rid of what's bothering you and they blame you because they don't want to accept responsibility and face the problem and the guilt.
Koliko puta su vas roditelji ubedjivali da se vi svega pogrešno sećate? Da su učinili sve za vas a vi ste jako nezahvalni? Da niste dovoljno dobri? Uporedjuju vas sa drugima? Nikada nisu zadovoljni vašim izborom partnera ili posla?
Verujte, to sve najmanje ima veze sa VAMA, već sa NJIMA- vašim roditeljima.
Svi oni projektuju svoje nezadovoljstvo na nas ali ne kritikuju sebe nego svoju decu. Dok sam sedela na klupi i povremeno vežbala, posmatrala sam decu i videla ogromnu nevinost u njihovim očima koju će svet odraslih nesavršenih ljudi uskoro usisati.
How many times did your parents convince you that you remember everything wrong? That they did everything for you and you are very ungrateful? That you are not good enough? Are you being compared to others? Never satisfied with your choice of partner or job?
Believe me, it has nothing to do with YOU, but with THEM - your parents.
They all project their dissatisfaction on us, but they don't criticize themselves but their children. As I sat on the bench and occasionally practiced, I watched the children and saw the immense innocence in their eyes that the world of imperfect adults would soon suck up.
Razmišljajući o tome, shvatila sam ogromnu odgovornost kao roditelja da ne ponavljam istu grešku. Neko mora taj začarani krug da prekine. Moramo osvestiti činjenicu da se prošlost ne može vratiti i da moramo biti svesni grešaka koje smo doživeli, oprostimo, izlečimo se i nastavimo sa svojim životom.
Naš zadatak je da podržavamo i ohrabrujemo našu decu.
Thinking about it, I realized the huge responsibility as a parent not to repeat the same mistake. Someone has to break that vicious circle. We must become aware of the fact that the past cannot be returned and that we must be aware of the mistakes we have experienced, forgive, heal and move on with our lives.
Our task is to support and encourage our children.
Vreme ne možemo da vratimo ali kao odrasla osoba možemo da odredimo granice. Źivite onako kako želite, sanjajte i verujte u svoje sposobnosti!
We can't turn back time, but as adults we can set boundaries. Live the way you want, dream and believe in your abilities!
Pozdrav od Anke vragolanke.
Greetings from Anka vregolana!