Where Do You Draw the Line?

Humans are unique beings that come to the world and thread through it without a manual on how to live a good life, but are mostly at the mercy of how they're raised. With that, we're bound to make mistakes; in fact, mistakes are part of life and our human nature. Basically, almost all reputable scientists made several mistakes before discovering what made them who they're, and mistakes are usually driven by ignorance, immaturity, or unintentional harm, and in such a situation, we can't because of such outrightly sideline a person, but instead draw them close, give them a second chance, and educate them on the best approach to life, but is it all wrong act that deserves a second chance?

Like I said, mistakes are normal, part of our nature. Without making mistakes, sometimes we won't be able to discover what's right, and that's why not every act should be deemed completely as evil and unforgivable. We should always give room for someone to change, especially when the act isn't entirely bad or doesn't completely seem harmful or intentional. Take, for instance, a few years ago, one of our newly employed staff at my former place of work made a terrible mistake that cost my team a shortage of production for that day.

I was very angry with him because I could remember vividly showing him the procedure of how the machine should be used to get the best result, but at the end of the day he went on to use another method, and that not only reduced our production quantity but also gave room for much wastage of material. Given how I was blasted by our manager at the end of that day's work, I would have easily just pinpointed him to get sacks for me to get someone else, but then I realized he was only trying to test a new method with the hope that it'd make the production faster, but reverse was the outcome of his trial.

So I ended up defending him before the manager, and that situation never repeated itself, as he went on to learn that other methods he tried that day had been tried by us that have been there for long and have discovered that they're ineffective. Since then, he stuck to my guidelines, and such never happened again. I mean, the first time it happened, I saw it as ignorant and gave him a second chance. Were it to reoccur again, then I might not, because by then he's already aware of what would happen if he didn't do things accordingly.

For that particular situation, I understand it's ignorance and probably stress that led to his act, and forgiving him gave him another chance to prove his worth. Also, paraventure: if I were to be lied to by someone out of fear and I found out, I might forgive such a person and give them a second chance, but it depends on the nature of the lie. I mean, there are some levels of liars that I might forgive but not give a second chance, due to how severe the lie is. A lie from a child to avoid getting punished can be forgiven, but then I'll teach such a child to do better and avoid lying. Trust is the bedrock of any friendship or relationship, and when such is a bridge, it paves way for distrust.

On the other hand, when talking about some act that might lead to me not giving such an individual a second chance, then you just know that such must have been very severe. For example, I remember at one point in time I once wrote about my childhood experience and how I was sexually abused, but one of our neighbors, even though I was young then, knew what she was doing was wrong, and since that very day I made such to avoid her and anything that'll make me remain in the same room with her alone, and that's because I just don't trust her to not try such again, taking advantage of young children in the neighborhood for her own sexual urge.

That is something I can't forgive, nor will I ever give such a person a second chance; in fact, for how severe such was even now that I'm old and I'm such, the lady is now mature as well. I won't for any reason whatsoever let such a person be near by kids for fear of what they might do; trust is every essential and one it's bridged; mending isn't something that can be achieved easily because you'll just find yourself being reminded about what the person in question did to you, and that kind of creates a wall between you and them even if they claimed they've genuinely changed.

Several other acts relating to the above can also lead to me not giving someone a second chance, like murder, rape, abuse, severe lies, leaking confidential information I told you in secret to others for the purpose of malice, and the like. If you commit acts related to that without any atom of remorse or willingness to change for good, then there's no point giving you a chance to one again hurt me; it's destroyed the bedrock of relationships and shows evidently that I'm not respected and valued by the person in question.

All photos are mine.