The silent battle

I don’t know what to talk about, I guess that's why it’s called the silent battle. This is about me, what’s going on in my head I have no idea about where to start or end. But a lot of people out there go through the same struggle, they sometimes end up taking their lives if they can’t take it anymore.

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There have been a lot of voices going on in my head, I sometimes sit with my friends silently and smile at everything they say but deep down they don’t know what’s going on with me.

I just wished I can figure out what exactly it is so that I can get to tackle it one after the other but the thing is I don’t know. I am in the University, in my final year but concentrating has been hard for me since the start of the semester, the question I keep asking myself is am I ready to face the other side of the world?

I think it all started a year ago after my brother was involved in a terrible accident with his friend that near killed him but we were so glad that he fought through it but that gave him a mark because he has been limping after the accident. At the time of the accident, I got frozen for about 20 minutes seeing him in the emergency room lying on the bed with blood all over him, the fear of loosing him came into my mind. Even though as at that time it wasn’t really serious as it is now, I have been trying to hang in there but I just wished I had someone to talk through it but then where do I start from?

That is the one question that keeps popping into my mind, I have 2 close friends I hang out with in school, and I feel like talking to them about what’s going on with me will just be bothering them.

Some may think that I just wrote it to get attention or vote, but the truth is I don’t care, all I care about is my mentality. I’m trying to find something that will help me overcome what’s going on with me and if writing helps then so be it.

All I need is an advice on how to navigate through what’s happening in my head.