_{Written listening to the song: Joji - Glimpse of Us. What does it mean to love? It seems it's not yet time to find the answer. A fringe has formed, is that I've split and I'm still a petal that has fallen, because she'll never kiss me again.}

She told me on November 5, 2021 that we should break up, I was a fool and deluded in love. Who is the unhappy one? Well, it seems to be me. Yes, I Moses the one who does not know what it is to renounce the multiplicity of love's sins.

I clung to the fact that our relationship was not over, it is unfair that the romance of the two of us ended, but the truth: there is nothing more to find. She left this country, wounded with a big stab my heart and also pierced this docile feeling, one that is still pure.

It's been a year since that day, so much time has passed, and I still don't want to resign myself. I have cried, screamed and also laughed in a way that does not end to satiate this agonizing pain, but I must face the truth.

Coffee is strange, it's just that the cup looks so black in my room. Nothing can be true anymore, nothing is true, and nothing exists.

I looked over to that spot from the balcony of my house, and on her house there was a garage sale. Dumb, dumb and dumber.

The only thing I had on was a pair of white underwear, I dressed quickly, simple, I didn't care about anything, I put on the first thing I could find. As I left the house I felt people staring at me, but it all came to a head when I was at the garage sale. My ex-girlfriend Daniela's mother was there, she looked at me longingly and simply nodded with her radiant eyes of kindness that I could come in.

I started to walk around and look at the objects for sale, among them, among them most of them were all hers, yes, Daniela's, do I despair? No, I think it's still love.

At the bottom of the garage sale was that, there was something I found and it was that painting of her drinking a cup of coffee as beautiful as ever. I didn't understand, why was her mother selling it a year after she left! It was the painting that was in her room, the one that witnessed every kiss, every special moment and when we intertwined our naked bodies in her bed.

It was as if they knew I would come for that painting, it was as if upon finding him here they told me to pay for it and hang it in my room to remember Daniela. I stopped thinking, and walked over to the painting, I couldn't resist and bought it.

Something in all this seemed strange to me, I think it was the nostalgic face of my ex-girlfriend's mother. I didn't understand, because she didn't say anything when I cancelled all the money for the painting. The only thing is that she looked at me with a galloping pain that pierced my soul. I left that place with something I never expected to have.

I walked up the stairs of my house little by little with the painting in one of my hands, silly, I tried to hang it in my room still knowing that everything had culminated, but the most surprising thing was that old letter that fell from the back of the painting.

When I saw that, I understood everything, and a prickling feeling began to rise in my chest, despair? Maybe. When I opened that, tears began to flow from my eyes:

If you are reading this, if you are reading this Moses, it is because our love has been true and you waited a long time for it.

How can someone disappear? How can someone not write? How does someone stop posting pictures on their social networks? Those must be some of the questions you must have asked yourself by now.

I went away, I left you my greatest love, but what does love mean? Do you remember, when I first gave myself to you, and plunged into your arms? I told you clearly: "That I loved you".

Don't doubt it, as I write this I still love you, I love you so much that I made the decision to separate from you. Maybe when you read this you will end up thinking that I was selfish, but I didn't want you to feel the pain I felt.

I didn't want you to see me like that, I wanted you to remember my smile, I wanted you to think about every single moment we lived together, I longed for your heart to always be the Daniela who wanted to conquer the universe and the one who wanted to have a beautiful family with you.

Reality is hard, the truth is difficult to face and separating myself from you so as not to see you suffer has been the strongest thing so far, but love is like that. Sometimes we wish the best for the person we appreciate with all our being.

You must ask yourself, "Why did I leave?" Flowers wither, flowers drop their petals, and I have had them all plucked from me. My time is about to end in this world, my time is about to end forever and I am afraid.

I am so afraid of dying, I am so afraid that you will hate me for not telling you the truth in time, for not telling you about my illness and I am so afraid that you will not be able to stand reading this. This, when I am no longer in this world.

I know you will come for this painting, I know you will read this and when you do it will hurt too much, but I know you will also be able to forgive me. My only and greatest love.

Your beloved Daniela Delepiani.

Image Source: Jesus Con S Silbada | Pexels | Vagelis Lnz | Unsplash | Berlian Khatulistiwa | Unsplash

The designs were made in Canva: Link