The COMedy Rumble: Youth vs Experience

One of my uncle's from my dad side invited the whole extended family out to help celebrate his wife's dad's birthday. Prof, we would usually call the man was celebrating his 70th birthday and had asked that the whole family be there for this special birthday. He said he doesn't know if he'll make it to the next one so it was good to just have everybody around. When we got the invitation and everybody in the house immediately looked at me because me and Prof didn't get along that well. He said I made jokes that were too dark for someone my age. My dad said I should behave or I wasn't going. Honestly I didn't want to go but then I heard the party was going to be at a Chinese restaurant and at that time, I had never been at a Chinese restaurant before so I was eager to go, not because of Prof, but the restaurant. I told everybody I'll behave and convinced them Prof would want me there. I can be very convincing especially when food is involved.

We had to stay at my uncle's house the day before the party because where we stayed was far away from the restaurant and we wanted to beat traffic.

We got ready the next day and headed for the restaurant. People had arrived before we got there. I was excited to see my cousins. Prof was already there too. He welcomed everybody, people wishing him a happy birthday. We smiled and shook each other's hand. In his mind I know he was going, "why did this devil come today" because in my mind, I was going "I'm not here because I like you, I'm just here to eat". After all pleasantries, everybody tried to find sits, it was a round table. Guess who my sit was next to, the man himself. I tried to switch but he insisted I stay close, what are you up to old man. My strategy to surviving the night was to stay quiet and eat but that was going to be hard to do with me sitting next to Prof. The entire party was just people eating and talking about how Prof is such a good person and how everybody is glad they know him.

I was pressing my phone, minding my own business when Prof called everybody's attention and said he wanted me to say something about him.

Everywhere was quiet with people starring at me. He was smiling, I thought to myself, "game on". I stood up and had to lie for 5 minutes on how I thought Prof was the most amazing person I know. When I sat down, he told me he knew I didn't mean any of that but I did a good job. It was my move next. I couldn't do anything else that wouldn't make me look like an asshole infront everybody so uploaded a funny picture I took for him one time on the big screen they had put up for his birthday videos. It wasn't really anything.

Towards the end of the party, Prof offered a truce, said we should stop being like this and offered me different types of food to try out. I didn't trust him but it was food so I just went along with it. Maybe our "fight" was truely over. The party ended, everybody said their goodbyes. I really had fun. On our way back, my cousins in the van were talking about how I and Prof had hit it off. I told them things are better now and he even offered me chicken as a truce. They told me there was no chicken in the entire dish they serve there. They asked what the meal was called, I remembered Prof said Tian jitui. They all started laughing.

Apparently, what I ate wasn't chicken, it was frog legs, yes legs of frogs. I ate leg of frogs, I felt sick and he told me it chicken. I now remembered how he was smiling when I was eating it. I thought it was because we were friends now. Prof 1, Nelson 0. I plan to get him back, his birthday is in two months. Help me think of ways I can get him back.