Sad or maybe Missing Something

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I’ve been telling others through writing and maybe even through words; I don’t like to have a richer life, why so? Simply because, too many obligations and too many responsibilities need to be done to earn more money. It’s like there’s no time to enjoy life, like having free time to do things that I really love to do. Obviously, photography, writing and doing nothing even for a longer time.

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You know, recently, I feel like I have no time to enjoy every single day. When I woke up early in the morning I could barely glimpse the beauty of what was outside; The smell of dust from the lost wind when it blew. The scent of flowers, trees, plants and more about nature. Eager, there were those times I was feeling it because of being desperate to stay longer outside.

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I wanted to breathe more fresh air from the province. The peaceful surroundings and view that is supposed to be relaxing. The sounds of roosters early in the morning and the chirping birds when afternoon comes. The sunset that was my favorite color before the night engulfs the surroundings. Those are the things I love to see, to experience and to feel but sadly because of a bigger dream of mine it is now impossible. It’s kind of sad and sometimes suffocating.

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Christmas is coming and as expected, it has become busier each day. My wife as a teacher too has a busier day. Together with her busy time I’m included because I always came along with her when it’s far away. I was the one to drive her to the specific destination. Aside from being busy in the store from purchasing goods and products to sell. My free time has been occupied because of her. That’s why I’ve been feeling down lately. I’m not complaining or even sulking, it’s just that there are things I wanted to do and then I couldn’t do. I’m feeling choke these days.

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The other day, I woke up early from my usual waking up time. There was another opportunity to earn bigger. Of course, it needed more time so the usual time was moved because of it. Yes, I was encouraged to do so but secretly after it was finished and finally I began to feel tired, I was unhappy. I’m not regretting what I’ve been doing all this time but, it’s just that somehow it’s kind of feeling empty inside. It seems I want something to fill the emptiness inside.

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When Spiderman said, “ with great power comes great responsibility.” But what I think as well is this, “too many opportunities comes with loneliness.” There are many sacrifices that must be made because of those. That’s why I thought so and simply because that’s what I’m feeling these days. I feel lonely or maybe just missing the things I wanted to do that I couldn’t do as of now.

Thank you for reading

Note: Images are not related to my writing. They are just my recent captured quite long.

All content is my own unless otherwise noted
If images are being recycled, I just found it fit in my article.

ABOUT ME

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Paul was born in Macrohon, Southern Leyte but currently living in Cahayag, San Francisco Southern Leyte. He graduated the course of a BS Mar-E or Bachelor of Science in Marine Engineering in 2019. Although writing is his passion so instead of sailing he decided on writing.

He writes occasionally about random stuff he would see in the outside world. He loves to express what he feels through writing because he's not good at speaking personally.

He also writes fictional stories and emotions because he thinks life matters. He is hoping that his words could reach someone who might be feeling down.

Join me and support me through my adventures not just to the world but also to the human minds not to hate being alive.

You can find me here:

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