Hellraiser HULU Trailer Mini Review (2022)

Hellraiser *HULU (2022)

SOURCE: Youtube 20th Century Fox

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But First A Side Note
YES! Movie reviews are ramping back up this week proper, along with some new jazz we're hocking out on you fools, with the gusto! Whut?

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WARNING OFFENSIVE LANGUAGE AHEAD

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I mean right from the jump we didn't give a fuck. The setup looks stupid, the cast look like gravy mongoloid toads, (all of them) & the FX already suffer from modernity reliance on CG.

I don't even get how you can make a Hellraiser movie & make everything about it look so neat & perfect. Where's the dirt & grime? Where's the natural, visceral uneasyness?

The cenobites are meant to look foreboding & evil, but they just look like a very crisp video game enemy mob. Like it looks as if they filtered over the practical makeup job & made everything smooth & shitty.

They look like a joke straight up, & the box? Looks & acts like a diabetic sex toy instead of the traditional cube of my namesake. I'm all for doing new things or spicing up a remake if its done right, but with the asthetics looking like this, & the lead actress looking like some hobo, I have 0 faith in this film delivering anything other than straight up shit.

There is light at the end of the tunnel, there will be a TV show coming to HBO. I think this will be more akin to the actual novella The Hellbound Heart. That I think would be better than trying to go the route Hulu is attempting.

The sad part is, spergs will enjoy this reboot, as they have 0 clue how to look deeper than the surface, & I wonder if this trend of processed food like cinema will continue.

Nevertheless, the gang & I will be siting down to watch this once it releases on 10/7/22.