When Desires Turn Into Unfulfilled Needs
At every stage of life, one has to start the journey with needs as a companion. As a child, the attraction to toys was there, but as an adult, it changes into a need for career, relationships, or life status. But at some point, I realized that fulfilling every need is not the main goal of life. Rather, many times, unfulfilled needs teach us the biggest lesson. I have felt this realization even more deeply in my career.
I made this post after remembering the beginning of my career. When I got my first job after finishing my studies, I felt like I understood the solution to all life's problems right here. In the first few months after starting work, I immersed myself in a new environment, new colleagues, and new challenges. But at some point, I realized that there is another world outside the office, where it is important to give time to yourself outside the pressure of work.
I still remember taking on my first big project. The project was a very important work for the client, and for me, it was the first big responsibility in life. The need was clear, I had to complete the work successfully and prove myself through it. But due to some problems in the middle of the work, it was not possible to complete it on time. That day, I felt like I might lose my job.
But that failure became my biggest lesson. I still remember my boss's words that failure is not just a consequence, it is an opportunity to start anew. That failure made me more focused and I started working with double the energy on the next project. I followed the same path in my next job too, but the path was different there. Applying all the rules in all situations does not yield the same results. Failure was necessary to be successful, because it made me more mature.
At the beginning of my job, I thought that if I performed well, everything would be easy, but the reality of my career was different, and I realized that every job has demands—from my boss, colleagues, and myself. But it is not always possible to fulfill those demands.
At the end of a while, I wanted a very big promotion for myself. I felt that if I did not get this promotion, my hard work was worthless. But after not getting that promotion, I realized that promotion was just a result. My real need was to gain skills and experience, which would take me to the next level.
The demands of my professional life have also come into conflict with my personal life. Many times, I could not spend time with my loved ones because of work. There was a time when a relationship broke up only because of my professional busyness. At that time, it felt like everything was over.
But that imperfection has also taught me how important it is to maintain balance in life. If there is no balance between work and relationships, both suffer. Since then, no matter how stressful the work is, I try to find time for my loved ones. One thing I have understood quite clearly, there is no such thing as the end of something, it is the creation of something new.
Looking back today, I understand that every unfulfilled need in life has taught me something new. Failures, imperfections, and obstacles are actually my greatest strength. Not having needs fulfilled does not mean that we are failures. Rather, unfulfilled needs make the necessary aspects of our lives clearer. We learn how to start anew, move forward with patience, and have faith in ourselves.
My professional life story may match your story. Because, we have all faced unfulfilled needs in our lives. Those needs are what create the depth of our lives. What needs in your life have not been met? And what have you learned from them? Take a moment to think about it. Maybe the most beautiful chapter of your life lies hidden in that imperfection.