In my mind no.09 Positive thinking [#39]
Hello Hive ๐งก
Today about positive thinking, how to start mastering this art leading to a happy life. First, however, I will present the experience I had recently. If You prefer to skip this story, start reading from "Positive thinking" part of this article
A story about loss and acceptance
On Saturday morning, after all-night dancing, I lost an e-altar ๐ฑ- commonly known as a cell phone, somewhere in the city on the way home. No wonder when sleep is knocking on the eyelids and the brain is like bathed in honey.
When I realized what is missing I was in front of the house. First I frowned in a feeling of helplessness. It was an automatic response from the body.
The brain in the face of stress instinctively follows the already experienced reaction patterns, most often based on childhood - which we do not remember.
"As the twig is bent, so grows the tree." ๐ฒ
Unconsciously, we are the sum of all observations from our life.
Watch what you automatically say, most of our reactions are acquired.
Duble watch what You say to children, every bad behaviour might be coppied
The first reaction was to scowl at my old trauma. In the past, when I still had chaos in my head, I regularly lost something and was often criticized for it.
It didn't take a few seconds when I smiled from ear to ear, because I had already lost a lot of things. Now I'm happy like never before in my life anyway.
Here, many years of practicing positive thinking have resulted in the sweetest treat with the taste of love โค๏ธ
Thru the day every now and then the phone addiction ringed in my head:
- Maybe check if you are going the right way on Google maps?;
- Maybe someone has already replied to you on Messenger?;
- Take a photo for Instagram;
- Check the time.
For all these impulses, I found the joy of being in the here and now. Happyness in the self-awareness that now I can notice such addictive patterns thanks to my separation from my e-altar. Actually, it's just an illusion that it is necessary for happiness. How human it is to believe in illusions!
Sometimes there were also heavier thoughts:
- I have no way of communicating with other people;
- I can no longer listen to music on my headphones while walking;
- I have no way to take photos;
- I lost thousands of photos of the best moments of my life;
- I cannot afford a new (used) phone;
- It won't be possible to record my vlogs for a while.
For each of the above vibration lowerers, my practiced thoughts responded with a warm, safe, and confident voice. All felt grievances were averted, discomforts calmed down, doubts dispelled.
I'm happy without a phone, in full acceptance.
In the evening, I was looking at the setting sun. I wondered what the experience of losing my phone was for? I actually talked with the Sun.
I told him I don't know what this is supposed to teach me? I have the impression that I do not need such an experience.
In the past, I often lost something and reacted every time with similar negative emotions. Now the reaction was quite different, I think I have gone through this stage of self-development - so what is this experience going to teach me?
Then the phone of the person I was spending this day with rings. The taxi driver says that during the second search of his car, He found the phone pressed between the seats and he will bring him tomorrow for small fee.
๐๐๐งก๐๐๐๐โค๏ธ๐๐๐งก๐๐๐๐โค๏ธ๐๐๐งก๐๐๐๐โค๏ธ
When I got home with my phone back, I found someone else's phone on the street. I connected it to charging so that the battery would not die and waited for it to ring.
After an hour, the owner showed up. As a thank you, he left me some hash he brought from the Netherlands and some money ๐
Positive thinking
Years ago, when I was depressed, I read more than once about the need to learn positive thinking.
It felt like lying to myself. It sounded absurd, and to me it was kitschy pink. What positive thoughts when the world is evil, gray and I'm nobody?
Your thoughts depend on what you experienced. They are mainly autopilot. So if you often have heavy thoughts, I guarantee you - they are not yours, and they are acquired most often at a young age.
They say "Man is a creature of habit". Part of awakening is to realise that, and start creating new patterns. So that the brain gradually stops using the old ones.
โจ๐ซ๐ฎ๐๐โจ๐ซ๐ฎ๐๐โจ๐ซ๐ฎ๐๐โจ๐ซ๐ฎ๐๐โจ๐ซ๐ฎ๐๐
You are a wizard, a sorceress - and your thoughts create reality.
โจ๐ซ๐ฎ๐๐โจ๐ซ๐ฎ๐๐โจ๐ซ๐ฎ๐๐โจ๐ซ๐ฎ๐๐โจ๐ซ๐ฎ๐๐
If now your eyebrow lifted, start an experiment for yourself - an exercise. Start like me, as a skeptic who is humble enough to challenge all the usual patterns in his head. Soon You will see, that it is mainly up to you what your world looks like, both internal and external.
Responsibility for your well-being is an elementary part of being an adult. Over time, no one will be able to affect your well-being, if you do not let him do it by falling into the autopilot paterns.
Your inner critic, neurotic, aggressor, melancholic, masochist will turn into a loving parent in the healthiest atmosphere you can imagine.
At first it will be difficult to interrupt the autopilot in the behavior/reaction/thought in the head.
If only that!
It will be even more difficult to notice when the autopilot starts. Autopilot incapacitate our self-awareness, something like being in a stereotypical hypnosis.
It requires consistent persistence.
โก๏ธ You need something that will remind you to exercise regularly โฌ
๏ธ
Write on Your wall, write on Your mobile phone the wallpaper, write with a marker pen on the mirror, stick a piece of paper in the car.
You will be practicing self-awareness of your thoughts by the way.
It will teach You to self-observe Yourself.
Talk with Yourself
For every bad/unhealthy thought, think/say a good/healthy one.
Even when You don't agree with it 100%.
Do you have a hard time thinking with love from your perspective?
Then consider what you would say as;
- Best friend imaginable;
- How would mother-love react to these heavy thoughts?
- And what would Jesus say about it?
- What does the sage say? Psychologist? Priest? Guru?
- What does the child say? What does the little dog say?
Of course, if Your mindset is in poor condition, you may think that the dog would snarl, and the wise man told You that he agree - You are useless ๐.
In this positive thinking learning exercise, assume that these imaginary prospects are looking for a positive message for you.
In meta perspective there are no truths, only different perspectives.
There is no good and bad, only deeds and various interpretations.
Exemplary thought - "sing no more, you have no talent!".
The teacher would say practice and you will learn. A coach could say the greatest talent is consistent determination to act. The child would say not to worry and keep playing singing!
Your friend might say:
I understand You feel this way, but I believe in You. Remember that You are learning new thinking patterns now? Listen to other voices-perspectives You create in Your head.
You are always able to see a different perspective, and if you feel that positive thoughts do not suit you, then you have a distorted image of yourself and it is not yours, but acquired.
Go out against these heavy thoughts. Ask them questions, find counter arguments.
There is a saying "fake it untill you make it",
in this case more liike fake it until you become it.
Whatever you hear in your head, or outside - it does it affect You.
By talking/thinking lovingly to Yourself every time heavy thoughts arise, You are teaching Your brain new reactions. As if uploading new software to the computer. After a while, light thoughts will appear in place of heavy thoughts.
As you look in the mirror
and it makes you scowl โก๏ธ ask Yourself "what do I like?" and smile.
It can be very difficult to look at Yourself in the mirror carefully, but it's very rewarding in the long run.
We unconsciously look at the mirror in a rush and see a false image of ourselves. When you meet people, You often unconsciously smile at them, You look cheerful.
When You look in the mirror, You think others see You like that. Where usually it is only You who look at Your face so coldly.
When I was depressed, I looked at the mirror sometimes with sadness, sometimes with contempt. Instinctively, I saw mainly what I didn't like, and looking with such powerless eyes it is not surprising that I strengthened myself in bad feelings.
Today I love to look in the mirror, for me it is like an automatic smile on My face, like a good drug. Sometimes I wave to Myself, say something, even make jokes of Myself.
Take some time in front of the mirror. Look Yourself in the eye, hold on as long as possible. Work then self-consciously with the thoughts that will arise.
Keep smiling!
If you have a lot of heavier thoughts,
then you are still in survival mode, vibration of shame/fear/anger.
After leaving fear, freedom begins.
Help Yourself by pointing out a different path.
When I was depressed I didn't believe in change.
I am a living example that it is possible.
I believe in You.
Believe in Yourself.
The main reason why I started this blog is to tell my story. |
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I've grown a lot thru my lifetime and learned things I believe should be taught in primary school, as a human right. |
Teachings about basic human needs, self-discovery, search for passion, cooperation, need of tribe, love, how to grow, healthy lifestyle for both physical and mental health. |
Summary of my previous articles if You missed them:
(I hope some of them will fit Your needs and do some good ๐คฉ)
About psychology
- What is the voice in Your head?;
- How to unleash Your authenticity?;
- Simple trick to learn mediation;
- Depression & herd/Love;
- Why depressed people don't search for help;
- The base of happiness;
- Anxiety, how to cope?;
- Love;
About weight loss / healthy food
- My weight loss 40kg in 6 months - introlude;
- Psychological aspects of gaining weight;
- When sugar and oil is good, and when bad;
Society
Hive in my perspective
Some healthy food propositions
I write every second post in Polish, and every second in English.
Subscribe please for much more โค๏ธ love! โค๏ธ
:)
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