My breastfeeding journey ended, and I had some thoughts as my little one turned Five months old.

Sometimes I can't help but think, are there women who are not that fortunate when it comes to breastfeeding? As I shared in my previous blogs, it was a struggle on my part. For the past four months, I have been lucky enough that I was able to pump at least four ounces. Or have I yet to try my best? Power pump, food that I eat, and enough rest. This is one of the struggles; if only my husband were here, it would be different.

Direct latch? Nope, it cannot be on my part, as my little one was not that patient. He would only end up sleeping even with an empty stomach. That is why he was mix-feeding. Sadly, last month, he completely stopped latching from me— Which affected my milk production. I wanted to cry but didn't know why I felt so sad. Thus, fellow Mommy's might understand me. Breastfeeding is also bonding time, and both baby and mother feel connected. Aside from the fact that formula milk was so expensive!

It took me weeks before I finally accepted that my breastfeeding journey ended. Big thanks to the husband for the morale support and for never blaming me. Opposite to that, he is always encouraging me. On the contrary, it was perfect timing as my appetite was also affected. I no longer felt that extreme hunger so I may lose some weight. Why I am so concerned about it? For health reasons. My pulmonary Doctors advised me that I shouldn't weigh more than 50kgs. Currently, I'm 60kgs.

Now, at Five months, my baby was drinking formula milk. Yes, he turned five months yesterday. It's the 13th of the month, remember?

Indeed he is!

Look how proud he is, as he can now lift his head while he rolls. A week of constant practice pays off!

Since I anticipated he would crawl soon, I bought a bed fence for his safety, and now, our bed looks like a vast crib! I practice co-sleeping.

From being mistaken as a premature baby to a healthy one! Now, I am more confident as a Mom that I made it. My sleepless night and all the body aches were all worth it just looking at my Boy!

I couldn't contain my laughter at times, seeing his pictures showing different emotions. Ah, my happy pill and I can't wait for the upcoming holiday to celebrate with my little family.

I know patience is badly needed, but I am happy that there is no PPD now. It seemed I had adjusted well to motherhood. Honestly, though, sometimes I feel bored and miss the old life. A career that is currently paused. Yet I know, in due time, I could redeem my old self again.

I apologize for the short blog post and the late replies. It might be early, but my little one was in the teething stage. Extra time and care was needed.

See, he is mad! 😆

Lead image was edited using Canva
Photos are mine
Footer credit to Sensiblecast.