I Completed The Novel I Was Writing, Now I'm Scared

I did it! "Woo." I almost jumped with joy but managed to maintain my composure, and instead gave a small nod of praise to myself and whispered. "Well, you did it. Now what?"

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Source

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Now, what indeed.

It took roughly 4 months to write, although, not each and every day. some days I would sit down to start writing the next chapter to push it forward and I'd end up staring at the screen, only to focus on one of the other projects I've been working on. It was a tough enough experience and I know the story as a whole is by no means perfect and still has so much work left to do.

I think NaNoWriMo was a great help to really push it forward. It kind of turned the idea of writing into a fun exercise, not because I felt like I was forcing myself to write. Instead, I felt like the whole experience of writing was turned into a game, I think gameifying certain aspects of your life can make the process a little bit more rewarding and stimulating.

Kind of like those confangled watches everyone wears now, where they compare the steps they did that day as if we're all meant to believe that they were out on a hike. Stop, we all know you ran up and down the stairs like a nutcase because you woke up too late to get in that early walk. I'm not judging, I'd probably do the same if I had one.

I've seen some watches that seem to insult the wearer; like some robotic coach. Not in a straightforward way, they're more passive-aggressive, which to me, is hilarious. Imagine spending so much on something only to be emotionally abused by it. "Oh, you haven't left the couch in 6 hours."

"Well god damn, I was on the piss last night and I'm in between awake and asleep, nursing a hangover and watching Judge Judy, leave me alone... You stupid.. Watch?"

Yes, that's right, that's why I wouldn't be able to handle one of those watches, I'd end up arguing with the thing and spend my days justifying myself to it. Anyway, Smartwatches and insults to the imaginary folks that live in my mind aside. I think they're a great idea because it gives the user a little goal.

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Onwards and Upwards
Yeah, the gamification is most likely the only reason I was able to write so much in November, I had a lot of fun but, now I'm kind of sitting here wondering to myself. "What's next?"

I have to start editing the whole thing and that is going to be a bit of a chore, it's the way it is though. I wish I could just write and hand it away and get it back in a few weeks' time, more or less ready to release. But, I know there are still so many changes to be made before I'd feel comfortable handing it off to a professional. It would be a waste of my time, their time, and my money, I don't know what kind of standard an editor would expect to receive a manuscript, in my mind, I have a feeling they would want to take it after the writer has signed off on the entire book and has no more rewrites in mind for it.

There will be changes to be made and tightening up to be done. Especially since I have the entire context of the book in mind, I'll be able to make changes throughout knowing what the ending is. Who knows maybe a reread of the entire piece will give me flashes of inspiration for certain scenes and it may even cause a few complete rewrites of sections.

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Who, What, Where, Why, and How?
I remember a couple of years ago back in college we were told to write our graduation film scripts and then pitch our ideas to the class before getting to work on pre-production. It was a test to be able to see if we could answer random questions on the fly and get some hints, tips, and thoughts about aspects of our story and film that we overlooked.

The title of this section is essentially what our tutor asked us to answer and told us that going into a pitch meeting to apply for funding for a project we had to be prepared to settle any doubts and explain the story in the quickest amount of time possible. The hardest question to answer is always going to be, why?

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Who?
Harvet - Is the director of Glass, he's the person in charge of the ordinance hall of the capital ship the story starts on. He has just committed a war crime and in the opening Prologue, we see the effects of his actions through the eyes of a dying survivor of a glassing run on Jex, the capital planet of Free Space. He is wrapped with guilt, especially after he realises that the planet had already surrendered. But, instead of accepting responsibility, his subconscious mind protects himself by blaming Runish, who is the leader of their campaign. He kind of loses it throughout the story and I thought it would be interesting to follow someone who is on the brink of insanity. Also, I wanted to see if it was possible to sympathise with a character who had done something so bad.

Dert's Crew - He and the others are a group of people who have carried out so many missions in the past that they are almost cocky when confronted with carrying out the task of killing a Trisken warlord, who has been rallying people to defend against ground invasions. Spoiler Alert - They soon realise that they aren't really equipped or good enough for the task at hand.

The Confederation as a whole has never dealt with war on this scale before. Dert's Crew has only ever dealt with, Bandits, Rebels, disorganised groups, and small factions, now they're thrown into the deep end, as the crew starts to die the ones who remain feel that they have to carry on, even if it means their own death.

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What?
It's a story about self-sacrifice and the idea of coming to terms with death, it's also about morals and understanding that there are no evil or good people, instead, each character is just a person who does what they think is right at the time and under certain circumstances.

The Triskens are defending themselves, The Confederation is also defending themselves by going to war with Free Space, as Gnosians started raiding Confederation territories. Dert, the leader witnessed the Gnosian raids firsthand and lost his partner to one of their raids. So, it's kind of grey, nobody is right or wrong and the entire campaign turns into a mess. But, this story follows one small self-contained story out of the entire Free Space Invasion.

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Where?
The entire story is set on one planet, and at that, it's only one city on that planet, called Trisk. The only time we're not on Trisk is when we're on Jex during the prologue and other than that we're in orbit following character in the fleet.

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Why?
This story wasn't planned, I was lost in thought one day and ended up writing the prologue, and halfway through that, I jumped to Harvet, who was looking down on the planet from the ordinance hall.

After that was complete, I decided that I wanted to continue the story and make it self-contained, following a small team as they carried out a mission, knowing from the start that each person was going to die seemed easy, as I knew this would just be a one-off, but, each time someone died I felt sad, there was no way around it though, as allowing them all to live would mean that the story would have to stay open.

Another reason for this being a one-off story is that I wanted to test myself with something that wasn't too grand in scope, something that could be easier to manage than the mainline book I'm writing in this world. Also, I want to use this as a tester to start my publishing journey.

Another reason for creating this is that I would like to introduce the world of these stories, slowly. Rather than throwing someone into the deep end with all the lore, worlds, characters, aliens, and tech, I thought it would be better to start small and slow, each release hereafter will give a bit more insight into the world as a whole; drip feeding, rather than a tidal wave.

I think even someone who isn't into Sci-fi could enjoy this based solely on the plot and characters rather than some expansive world which I think could make people feel lost.

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How?

1. First, I'll be compiling all of the separate chapters into a word document, and then I can start editing it. I know there could be areas where I will need to bridge gaps between chapters and tighten stuff up.

2. Second, depending on how well my own editing goes, I will be searching for an editor to give it the once over as I have a feeling someone would be able to clean up certain sections and have ideas for improvements to make in the writing and potentially the story too.

3. Third, once it is all formatted I'll start to cross the next bridge, which will be self-publishing. I'm thinking of going the route of Amazon, E-books would be a good way to go, but I think there is also a print-on-demand section to produce hard copies if any are bought.

I don't have any delusions, I don't think it's going to be a best seller or anything, I think the main reason for writing this is the excise and experience I'll have once it gets out there. I'm looking forward to moving on to the next thing, but, first I'll finish this off and get it out there.

I joined the PageDAO writing competition by submitting the first chapter of this story and I actually came in 5th place. It was the first writing competition I joined. I won a prize and I think that kind of gave me a boost of confidence in myself and my writing.