Parenting In Fear

A long time ago, when I was very active on Facebook, I read a post about how a child sued his father. Apparently, the father, who is an African, took his kid overseas to stay with his grandmother. About ten years later, the man came for his child. The man found that the little child he left ten years ago had grown up to be spoilt and disrespectful. The father couldn't believe his eyes, so he raised his hand and gave him a stern reprimand. To his surprise, the next minute, the child reported him to the police who came to arrest his father. After facing legal sanctions, his father decided to take his kid back to Africa to spend some time in his hometown. They got on the plane and immediately they landed at the airport, his father dealt with him just as he had overseas. Again, he tried to report his father to the police who were there, but all they did was laugh at him and say “you are in Africa now.”

Growing up, I often heard stories about how kids could report their parents to the authorities if they were physically disciplined. Meaning, parents were not allowed to raise their hands on their kids. Of course, this only happens in European countries. I don’t know how true this is. But the stories I have heard and movies I have watched is enough proof that this truly happens. I’d often wonder how the kids would put themselves to do it. After reporting your parents to the authorities, how do you still manage to live under the same roof with them? I guess I have this many questions running through my head because I grew up in an African home.

Growing up in an African home, you dare not raise your voice back when your parents are dealing with you, talk less of reporting them to the authorities. I was a very calm kid, and I rarely got beaten by my parents. My brother on the other hand was as stubborn as a Christmas goat. Every day was a different crime from him. He’d go out in the morning and come back at night to receive beatings from my dad. I’m pretty sure the thought of reporting my parents to the authorities never crossed my brother’s mind. Even if he gathered enough courage to sue them, I’m pretty sure they’d laugh at him or even add to his beatings. In African homes, parents are like mini-gods. You do whatever they ask you to do. And when they punish you, the worst thing you can do is cry and hide in a corner till you feel better. That’s our way of life.

I understand that parenting is difficult and some parents can go overboard while reprimanding their kids. However, I still stand on the fact that allowing children to sue their parents could have harmful consequences. Parents should have the upper hand. They should wield authority however they want. However, if children are given the rights to sue their parents, then they have been given the sword of authority and can wield it however they want. The fear of legal punishments would make parents hesitant to punish their kids, no matter what they do.

For example, if a child intentionally breaks two plates in the house and the parents try to reprimand them, the child might sue them. The next day, the child breaks another two plates, the parents fearing legal punishment will just let him go unchecked. If they are not careful, that kid might proceed to break all the plates in the house. Of course, the child knows that nothing will happen because they believe that the law has their backs.

In conclusion, allowing children to sue their parents can lead to harmful consequences. Instead of this, other solutions should be used to build a healthy family.

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Thanks for reading.