Selling Your Blemish: Creating Awareness For The Existence Of Imperfection.

almost 3 years ago (Edited)

One thing I've learned overtime is that people form their own version of happiness, this means that while happiness can be generalized or its derivation tied to some certain goodies of life, people try to create their own version which is excellent, but sometimes we go the extra mile, doing too much which subconsciously con others into thinking we might be living a fulfilled life; better than theirs.

Nevertheless, this doesn't mean that life in general is devoid of sadness, pain or challenges. I try as much as possible to create an altruistic Image of what my reality seem like, so I can remind people around me that my life is full of struggles irrespective of their perceptions, or the meaning they're reading towards me.

Human beings, we're naturally impressionistic.

....In other words we try to embrace some certain aspects to our lives leaving the other aspects in other to create or carve and idea or thoughts in the mind of others, while this might be the goal of others, some others just use this as a coping mechanism when things aren't succulent in their lives.

Sometimes, real life issues can be overwhelming, we want to smile, fall in love, look at the sunset, eat an ice cream, but these things which secondarily makes us feel alive cannot take away our main struggles, when we're reminded of how poor we are, the struggle with mental exhaustion, the hustle to land the right job, beating deadlines unsolicited responsibilities, the pain of niggling health issues and many people, we tend to lose it.

Sometimes we try to shut out our different realities not really because we want to live fake lives but because our own personal realities aren't really motivating enough. No one should doubt the essence of motivation. Because apart from the fear of death, we need to create diverse motivation to not just live, but thrive. When we live to thrive, it means we're attaching more essence to our existence, but originally, we need the motivation to keep living.

A Case Of Perceptive Comparison

We're own judge, jury and executioners, we've created pressure as a default ingredient to living our lives. We're always struggling to beat deadline and timelines created by other people. So whenever we fail instead of acknowledging failure and moving on, we try to create a different perception. It's really okay to be fragile, it's okay to be a failure, it's okay to be weak, it's okay to be sick and helpless.

The reasons why we often think this is a taboo is because we make a lot of comparison. We look at the lives of others, and we think they're better than us at handling their own life issues not knowing that the people we're using their lives as case studies are only painting an illusion of what they want us to see.

Because we're scared, we regularly live our lives to meet standards that aren't even set by us. We're so frightened by what others would think of us, we'd rather create a mirage.... a bubble that's contrary to the real situation we find ourselves.

I wouldn't fault anyone for this, no one wants to be looked at differently. Subconsciously we've lived or presented our lives in manners that aren't really our own. Inadvertently we tend to be different version of ourselves and sometimes this might not really be the intention.

In fact, the whole idea of living fake lives emanates from knowingly or unknowingly trying to be different from we originally are. Take a look at social media a pure agent of chicanery. Each day, our imagination is widening, some women see images of their fellow women with massive derrière it goes straight to their ego and beginning to plant seeds of unaccomplishments, within them.

They begin to hate their bodies, wishing for curved cleavages and blinking skin even if originally these mental images are improvised to create an aesthetic effect. Nevertheless, envisaging these things makes us wonder the complexities to the human anatomy, but then, it's what it is.

Simplified Rather Than Modified Or Edified

This is why I don't take things I see on social media to heart. While I'm not living the best of life, I try to communicate this to people who look up to me. I am fallible, full of mistakes and inaccuracy. This is part of who I am, but if isn't totally who I am. A complete human cannot ooze of perfection, either naturally or inorganically.

So, trying to create a perfect image, untainted without blemish makes people feel like they can blot out some default deficiencies about their lives. While I was growing up, I struggled for acceptance, (still struggling). I tried to work too hard to achieve the perfect version of me. However, there were just things that were innate that I couldn't change. I felt these things have hugely discredited me.

I felt I had limited choices, because I couldn't embody attributes that would extrinsically draw others to me. While these things are still some of my fears, I've learned to gradually live for "me". I've seen gory situations in life and this has kept me afloat. Amidst all my insecurities, I've found an internal driving force. It is important we use our stories to remind people of how fallible we can be rather than perfect we might seem. Sell your blemish and failure stories.