Living the Illusion of Perfectionism.
Making comparisons is a type of check that frequently brings us back to our present reality. However, we often demonize it because it can lead to greed, ungratefulness, malice, and discontent. However, we frequently forget that, in its most basic form, it is a human phenomenon that helps us stay on track and adrift. It is difficult to practice the art of comparison without being drawn into its negative vacuum.
There comes a point where we start to lose ourselves, which is why we have decided that it is better not to indulge in it than to lose ourselves to it.
We live in a world where it is very easy to make baseless comparisons; people no longer want to live their original lives because they may feel cheap, subpar, or below expectations; therefore, with the tool at their disposal, they will choose to create a different impression, a much better impression that is diabolically sound.
This means that we can no longer foster a healthy environment in which we can use the lives of those we know to demonstrate the kind of progress we should make. Because they appear to be raising their levels higher than they are, it may lead to feelings of discontent, anger, and frustration, making comparison toxic to one's mental health.
Some people create a perfect persona; we see them as glorified investors with never-failing investments, a perfect marriage, good children, no drama, a beautiful family, and a lot of money. This perfect front makes people yearn for the kind of life they have. We start asking for the recipe to such a perfect marriage and such a successful business empire, and when we do not get it, we feel unfortunate, cursed, and even angry.
We lose appreciation for the things we already have because we believe they could be better, but they aren't.
A perfect life on screen should create a smoke screen and the possibility of deception, but it does not; instead, it creates an ideal opportunity to sell. When we see couples with perfect lives on social media, it is easy for them to create products that have made their marriage successful, which people will buy. In fact, they can write books and persuade people to buy, and they will.
Why?
They are already selling the image of a perfect marriage, and you want their secret or recipe for making what you have work.
We want simple solutions to big problems in our lives because no one wants to spend time solving problems, especially if there is a place that sells a quick fix or a shortcut to big problems. We are often taken by what we see, which makes comparison a rabbit hole that sinks and sucks you deeper.
People no longer want to show their weak sides because they consider them vulnerable.
We live in a world where validation is more important than anything. We want others to see a smiling, happy, fulfilled, accomplished, beautiful, and successful version of ourselves because we believe that being sad, sick, depressed, or in pain is weak and repulsive.
Nobody wants to be perceived as a crybaby, so we raised the bar so high. We would rather cry in our closets than shed a tear in public because we can not afford to be perceived as failures, incapable of succeeding, finding work, staying healthy, becoming wealthy, or raising a comfortable family. When people are failing in some aspects of their lives, they would rather hide it than admit it and seek help.
The front we frequently present is that we have raised life's standards so high that we now see failure as something we should not be associated with, so we prefer to fail peacefully while deceiving others into believing we are the epitome of success.
Acceptance is something we dislike doing; it is difficult to accept certain realities, and we end up living in denial while mocking others who are in similar situations. Some people find comfort in making others think less of themselves. We have the mindset that we must always be better than others in order to avoid being at the bottom of the pile. However, we all require humility and a more profound understanding of life.
I have realized that we can always be hurt by conditions, circumstances, and life.
There is nothing wrong with expressing discontent, pain, and dissatisfaction. When life gives you a reason to be weak, go through it without thinking that someone else will do better than you when they are in your position. There is nothing wrong with being weak. Life happens to us at different times, and no one can tell us how much pain we should feel because no one is as strong as they appear.
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The truth is that there's a lot of competition in our world now. Everyone wants to climb the ladder of success with no care. Then, how can the people behind you learn and set an example for themselves.
People set standard that can't be met for themselves because they feel they can, which is not wrong, but neither is it right. Living above your means leads to frustration and lots more.
It's a lot of fakery. A lot of things in the world is aggrandized, aggravated and purposefully elevated. Nothing feels original as people wants to show personalities that seems too. It's the world we now live in.
Yeah, and they do that to hurt themselves. Smh
I liked the way you ended this, man
The thing is that we have conditioned by society to live a certain way and to aspire to be perceived a certain way. No one person created this standard. It is a collective effort of even you and I who might not like that the said standards exist.
Sure, showing weakness should be norm, but the same people that say it have a certain threshold of weakness they’re willing to empathize with. Anything beyond that, and they join the rest of society to beat and curse you back in line.
It's painful though. Not a lot of people thinks people should display weakness. But weakness is a emotional reaction to things we pass through and it's terrible to tell people that should not feel weakness when it's an emotional stress that people often need to release in other to heal.
I've had people staying that to me and calling it things like anxiety disorder, but then, when you've not seen pain it's easy to diagnose others with weakness.
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There is a lot of competition in this world and it would have been better if it is a healthy competition. Most of them are fake and not even good for us. At the same time, we just have to stay away from them and stay on our lane to prevent us from doing the things that we would not want to do
A lot of the competition is not healthy like you've pointed out. We would do ourselves a lot of good, if it was actually healthy.
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You captured the shallowness of today's deceiving appearances so well. And the strong effect they have on us, especially the youngsters, who grow up in a society where appearances become their distorted reality.
Thank you, taking an in-depth look into today's society it's quite easy to see this. It's a plague that's eating deep into the human society
Morning
Weakness has played a vital role in the building of great leadership in famous people you learned about in the history book.
It is a personal evaluation in order to make a change in one's development. If I am not perceiving improvement from a counterparty in business after errors, it is time for me to find another business associate.
Thank you for sharing this inspiring words.
Peace
Yes, weakness is human, and nothing to be ashamed of.
Not everything will go according to plan so I don't think anyone is perfect. You might have a perfect day but it won't always be like that. I do agree that a lot of people just throw on an appearance of doing well though.
A lot of people just throw in that appearance, I guess there's this discrimination that flies in the air when others perceive their fellow humans to be struggling.
Modern comparisons has been pushed to extremes that makes it so much harder even to attain or settle for a bare minimum, since this facade is now taken for reality and anything not exactly that is termed something unacceptable. I would rather not hop on that treadmill of modern perfectionism and take life as it is, in both its positive and negative aspects.
Well you're right, I guess it's one of those side effects that comes with modernism, the modern day man. I've shared my struggles to a seeming audience who was felt I was the perfect person, and suddenly they don't want to be like me anymore. It's life. People would rather want to be like you if they think or perceive you to have a perfect life
You are right, it's so easy to get caught up in the highlighted reels of others' lives and forget about the realities of our own. We've all been there.
You're spot on when you say that social media often creates a smoke screen of perfection, making people yearn for lives they may never have instead of just living in the present and appreciating what we have.
It's as if we're all walking on a tightrope, trying not to show any signs of weakness or vulnerability. But as you pointed out, life happens to us all, and it's okay to be weak sometimes.
Indeed, Jose, the so-called "successful people" are all about selling us perfection these days, from looks, money, and love, to living the dream life. Sometimes, we just gotta learn from our own flaws, weaknesses, and struggles and strive to be the best version of ourselves without making any comparisons. That's how we grow!! But hey, we tend to forget our own life purpose and mix up being real with being fake. We even have a universally approved motivational phrase for it, like - "fake it until you make it."🙌
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