Cancellation is unacceptable ...

If the mind hurts, it's because the body hurts.

When two people love each other, they accept each other as they are, but when one of the members of the couple has behaviors that harm the other, and is not able to negotiate those behaviors or is not able to find a way that their attitudes do not harm, then, definitely, that couple has no remedy, and the affected party has to leave, run away.

I tell this to one of my sons, who is almost separating from his partner of 12 years of cohabitation.

Trying to make the other happy by being unhappy yourself is a bet on failure. Shared happiness begins in individual happiness, and this is the one I prefer.

My son told me that what is happening with his partner is that lately he doesn't want him to go out alone, and he tells me that he is struggling with this situation because he has always been a free person, that I think is stressing him a lot, and I already recommended therapy for both, since it is very important to strengthen and raise self-esteem individually, to somehow reconnect to be happy, because for both "they should not cancel each other out as individuals".

When someone hurts you, you do what is necessary for that person to change his behavior in such a way that it does not cause you pain, and if that person continues to do it, it is time to let him go or to leave you.

Now, how do you know that you have an unresolved emotional problem? When we repeat behaviors that do not give us happiness, and we cannot stop doing it.

There are people who like to look for the cat's 5 paws, where there is no cat, no paws, or anything.Some people even accuse you of the black death, because of the weather.

Never be next to someone who doesn't allow you to be yourself. We definitely have to have relationships that allow us to be and add to our lives.

You have to give yourself that gift.

Sometimes the one who needs to understand is yourself.. without a doubt, the thing is to know to what extent to negotiate certain things so that the relationship works, uyyyy and that point is very delicate, because in the negotiation even one can lose oneself.
It is essential, and it has worked for me these 47 years of marital life, to establish agreements, of course certain conditions apply. Annulment is unacceptable.

I have always thought this, and I still maintain it, that one has to fall in love with reality, not with an illusion; and if a person does not accept us as we are (of course, if our flaws and virtues do not affect mental health), leave it, get out of there; it has happened to me that usually the people we don't even think about having a relationship with are the ones we do best with.

These are difficult decisions to make and execute, but they are always liberating.

Here thinking 🤔 out loud. What will be the reason for people to stay "hooked" where they are not happy?

Janitze 🌹