A YOUNG WOMAN’S DILEMMA

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Life has been both beautiful and somehow lately, I’ve just been generally trying to survive most days and other days I’d be like okay I can do this, in fact I’m already doing this! That’s what makes living worthwhile innit? Having troubles some days that cause you to doubt your existence and getting a solution helping you realize that it was just another phase to a better phase.

As a girl, I’ve been faced with a lot of wrong decision making as regards most of my relationships and going forward it doesn’t even get easier. As much as I’d love to stay away from having anything to do with a guy as a girl, it isn’t just easy at all. I have to let go of my feelings or should I say suppress my feelings but it doesn’t just work that way or does it? I’ve found myself in need of someone to love me and also willing to love someone even though I’m not ready for it yet. I guess it’s just the normal urge to be loved and to love.

Well, in as much as it’s hard for me to stop my feelings towards a guy, the one thing that makes it easier for me is the fact that I’m not ready for an heartbreak or to break someone’s heart too and also, I want to be with someone who is not just going to be in for the now. I know we don’t know the future but I’ve always believed that I want to be with someone who sees himself with me forever if possible and knowing that this is hard to come by, it has given me the opportunity to set my priorities right as regards being in a relationship.

And besides, dating is something that comes with a lot of responsibilities and I don’t think I’m cut out for any of them. In as much as I want to be loved, I do know that there are some certain things I don’t want to be doing now especially when I’m very sure I don’t plan getting married now. And also I’m not ready to be a mother too, heheh. But then, in all of these, I still struggle with knowing when and when not to push someone away from me.

I do have a lot of principles as regards whether or not I should be in a relationship and that is because I know that if I get it wrong at any point I will be the one to suffer for it. Yes, love is a beautiful thing and finding someone that loves us is also beautiful but then I do wish those things can be on hold but no, it’s not possible, like I said, they are part of what makes the troubles we face as humans everyday and until we find a solution, we will see it as a thorn in our flesh.

So what do you advise? Should I keep being a strong girl and avoid relationships or I should be more lenient so I don’t drive my future husband away? lol. Do well to leave your comment below. This is kinda personal but I just felt like sharing to hear your opinion and I hope I get good results from this 🤍.

The image and gif used are mine

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29 comments
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I feel you, Hope. Even guys feel that way.

If that guy seems like a good guy, and he's already "a good friend," taking it up a notch with him would only allow you really know if it's going to...

It should be effortless and truly be something that ultimately makes you better as a person - with both of you playing your parts, of course. You'll know and feel it if it doesn't, and then it's perfectly okay to to let it go when you realise.

If you'd rather not dabble into it, you have love around you and there's beauty in basking in that too. When you're indeed ready, you'll take the step.

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My daddy have spoken 🥹. Thank you so much for stopping by Jay and for leaving this thoughtful contribution and advise.

I’m definitely going to give it time and take the next step when I know or feel I’m ready 🥰.

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Hehe. I think you are thinking too much and right now rather than thinking such kind of thing you should need to focus on your career. In case of love, I think it will comes to you automatically. You will find one when it will be the time. I just shared my opinion 🙂.

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You are right, I have other better things to do than concern myself with love but then it is part of us and we can’t deny that they do come in the way every now and then.

I don’t look for love all the time but it comes and I’m not ready for it and vice versa. Anyways, I’d keep trying my best to focus on the things that matter the most to me. Thank you so much for sharing your opinion with me 🥰

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Thanks for sharing your experience with us!
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So what's best for you baby girl, so long as you're happy and at peace with your decision.

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It's the photos for me.
I looked at the photos more than 100 times 😍

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There comes a time in one's life when I guess this feeling comes. So it's okay to feel like you aren't ready for any relationship wahala for now until when you are ready to take the bull by the horn. You know one has to be emotionally stable to be able to dabble into any relationship to avoid breaking and crushing of hearts, hehehe.

So I'll suggest you don't think too much about it, live the life ahead of you while planning how you want your future to be. At the right time, love will find you.

!HUG

#dreemerforlife

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Thank you so much for your advice mama, I’d keep these words in mind ❤️

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Depending on where you see yourself in the next 5 - 10 years. Do you want to be a mom? A full time housewife? A career woman? Or a perfect blend of all?? This should guide you on what to do.

#dreemerforlife

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Do what will make you happy Hopie, we don't know what tomorrow holds so grab every chance you get at being happy.
So what if you don't get married to your first boyfriend. As long as you had a great time with that person and made so many beautiful memories, that's all that matters.

In the end, just grab every chance you get at being happy in life, and don't think too much about tomorrow, because life always has its own plan for us, what you have in mind might be different from what life has installed for you.

#dreemport

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I needed to hear this 🥺. Thank you so much for stopping by and sharing your thoughts with me sweetheart ❤️

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Relationship and love. Hmm, okay, keep them, not too close, no when to push, let it flow natural, don't be overwhelmed by sensitivity, pause and smile pretty sweet. And have it going along the one who like.

You love, him, but be focus and let him know, but don't push away, be around.

Let is satisfy you first, put yourself on the spot first, do you really need damper in this?

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Brilliant! I love this and I will definitely keep this in mind 😊.

Thank you so much for your thoughtful comment ❤️

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