Someone is departing Vietnam after falling victim to exactly what I have been talking about

If you read my stuff you would have encountered that I have written about the type of individual that shouldn't attempt to relocate to South East Asia or probably, and I can't confirm this because I haven't been there, any non English-speaking country in the world.

There are not a great deal of opportunities here for people to make ends meet and the things that they can find are normally not very rewarding as far as satisfaction with one's work is concerned either. I have seen so many people fall victim to this plight and end up leaving many years later at a rather old-ish age to be throwing in the towel and starting over. I will be changing the names of the people in this story but the message is real.

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I'm going to refer to the person that is departing as "Paul" even though that is not his name.

Paul has been in Vietnam for what the Brits refer to as "donkey's years." Basically he has been here longer than almost all of us and is one of those people that everyone knows even if they don't hang out with him. He had a reputation in the past for being a bit of a drunk, which is extremely common in the expat community. He is no stranger to other drugs as well but only dabbles in them, which is a good thing. After a health scare a few years back he kind of sorted his lifestyle out to a certain degree, but he still never really did anything of consequence as far as employment was concerned. He tried to open a few small businesses but for various reasons they all failed. He also did a bit of teaching of English as a Second Language (ESL) over the years. As anyone knows these jobs do not pay well nor are the schools equipped to help you to succeed at this. Basically they give you around $1000 a month to be a professional clown. Paul figured out really early on that this was not the job for him and I understand because I've done this job and it absolutely sucks.

In the past few years Paul had been traveling to Ireland for work in order to prolong his time here in Vietnam but when he would return he would find himself in a situation where he was running out of money rather rapidly and since the flight back to Ireland costs around $1000 round trip, he was spending a lot of what he earned back there doing god knows what, just on the flights. A big part of the reason why he didn't simply move back for longer periods of time is because he has a long-term girlfriend here and also a house that he has to pay rent on whether he is living in it or not.

A few years went by with this being his routine and when he would return and I would see him out, he was constantly stressed about money and was getting upset about how things weren't working out for him. Well after a couple of years of bouncing back and forth he finally admitted that this is untenable and told us all that he was going to move back to Ireland permanently and bring his girlfriend with him. They are putting on a happy face about this but I don't think either of them are actually excited about doing this. Also, South East Asians are a bit notorious for being unhappy in the western world and this creates rifts in relationship for nearly all the people I know that have moved their girlfriends or wives back to the west with them. Hopefully Paul's situation is different.

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Just like anywhere in the world, we probably have this grand idea about what Ireland is like but that is just what the tourists see. Living there is an entirely different animal, just like living here in Vietnam is very different than visiting here.

The tragic thing about this move with Paul is the fact that he probably should have seen that this was something he needed to do many years ago. He is now in his early 50's and you have to ask yourself, what the hell is someone that old possibly going to do for a living when they haven't been part of the workforce for decades? This is something that I dwell on about my own life but I am very careful to identify the warning signs in my own life and make the move before I end up with Paul.

Paul has known for a long time that living in Vietnam was not going to work out for him, but he kept doing the same thing over and over again and hoping, quite obviously in vain, that things were going to magically change for the better. They didn't for years and eventually he had no choice but to pull the trigger and move back to his home country with his tail between his legs, likely depending on his very old parents for support at the start. I feel bad for Paul, but I can't help but look at him and say "you knew this day was coming.... why did you wait so long?"

We only get one shot at life and I feel that a ton of people move to places like where I currently live with delusional ideas about how things are going to work out for them. So I offer my truthful advice to anyone out there that feels the allure to move to a place like this early in life and do "whatever" for a job: Don't. Just don't. There are some outliers like me but honestly folks, I was extremely lucky to avoid all of this. I am an exception to the rule to the point that I couldn't possibly even offer any advice for people to "get lucky" like I did. It is almost a sure thing that if you move over here in your 20's or 30's, that you will be retreating later on and making your life more difficult in the process.

Work in your home country, make your money, live sensibly and build up some nice savings. Visit here and there all around the world and find your spot. Then, and this is the crucial part, do NOT move there until you are certain you have enough money to never need to work again. This is the only guaranteed path to victory.