Iβm 42 and thriving
Monday, 27th of May 2024 [117]
Happy birthday to me π₯³
Haha π
This past weekend I went on a shopping spree! I bought lots of new clothes, new backpack and had a haircut. My excuse?
No other motherfucker with spoil me on my birthday, so I need to spoil myself π
When I started seeing my holistic healer at the end of summer last year, he took my date of birth, plotted my numerology chart and said:
Youβre at the end of your 6th cycle. Things are challenging for you now, but youβll see a shift in your life once you complete that cycle around your birthday time (plus minus half a year).
I wanted to believe him. I really did. But I was at such unhappy place at that time that I found it really hard to believe that life can be bright again one day. I really wanted toβ¦
In fact, the decision to seek help from external source was just the step in the right direction. Arty really kick started my healing journey. His holistic approach to health was just what I needed at the time. Not medication, not pity party, but I thorough change in all planes of existence.
He started from clearing my energy field, then cleaning my diet, cleaning my mind from damaging thoughts, cleaning my body with a thorough detoxing massages, smoothing out those little aches that showed allover my body as it was flooded with cortisol I produced abundantly at that time.
Your attitude sucks! he said to me in the second session. My bestie loved it when I told her about it. We laughed and laughed in the car on our way to yet another London dance adventure. Heβs so right! she said. You canβt keep punishing yourself for all the seeming mistakes youβve made. Youβre way too hard on yourself she added.
I was. I am. I have always been. Itβs no coincidence that the job I do is quality inspection. Quality over quantity. I live my life by this rule. Thatβs how you grow as a person.
But they both (and others before them) were right. There is a way to always strive to get better without hurting myself in the process. Without the constant guilt that became so ingraved into my personality. Covered by cockiness, defence and confidence.
To let go of guilt was the hardest thing I had to overcome in my life. Purely because itβs been with me my whole life and almost invisible to my own eye. I needed an outsiders perspective on that. I needed someone to point it put to me whenever the sneaky pattern showed up againβ¦ and againβ¦ and again. Literally at every single session with Arty. I canβt say Iβm completely rid of it, but Iβm much more conscious of it and much quicker to let it go whenever it shows its ugly head again.
Fast forward 9 months and a child was born!
Their name is Hapiness
I longed to this for so long and when I posted Actifit report for the first time in 3 months on my alt account I was still very sceptic. I wasnβt sure if it was real or whether the trip to Polish mountians just very temporarily flooded my body with endorphins.
The exercise.
The views.
The conversations.
Cold beer at the top of the mountains.
The blue skies.
The greenery.
A little fall down the mountain? A little blood and knee bruised like back in my childhood? Who cares? π
Polish mountains have a way of sneakily bringing the happiness to your life. My childhood friend who took me for this beautiful hike healed her broken heart after her divorce a few years back in those mountains. Iβm sure itβs not just the case with Polish mountains, but any mountains, although Polish ones are the only ones I know, the only ones I visited.
I felt so much peace that day and the smile was not leaving my face throughout the day. Doesnβt matter that I only had one hour of sleep and I had to wake up at 3am the following morning to catch an early plane back home. I was af peace. I had to write about it!
2h wait at the airport is a perfect opportunity to write. Basking in the beauty of the amazing sunrise only inspired me more. I could catch up on sleep⦠but I was too excited.
The happiness lasted another day.. and another dayβ¦ and another day. I wasnβt even bothered when my boss asked me to cut my holiday short and get back to work. He needed me and I showed up. He was the happiest boss Iβve seen for a long time. I canβt believe only a year ago I hated him with passion π He was however an important piece of the puzzle. I βusedβ him to get over myself. It paid of a hundredfold. About it another time!
Not only my boss was happy to see me back at work. My front tooth was back in place and I could smile again! I spread those smiles all around me. One colleage after another was leaving our inspection room happier that they were before they entered. Happiness is as infectious as constant winging. And Iβve been whining for way too long!
More good news were pouring in. Two of my least favourite colleages either left the company or are on their period notice. Those not really qualified have been degraded. New colleagues turning out to be the gems. Old colleagues are even more pleasant to work with. Boss happy with my continued efforts to improve our process. All 3 of us in inspection catching up with never ending tasks and having a bit of a breather! That hasnβt happened for months!
Is this even real? my closest colleague and I were asking ourselves. It seems too good to be true!
But there is more. My bday weekend arrived. Shopping spree. New haircut.
Sunny days. Exciting trip to London with my bestie.
New adventure starting this Wednesdayβ¦
Should I say? Should I keep it a secret? Fuck it! The whole adventure has to stay a secret in our salsa circle. For many reasons. Politics above all. Or rather βbolliticsβ! New word Laleh invented on Saturday. Bollocks + Politics = Bollitics πππ
Since you guys are not in my salsa cirlce, I can say itβ¦ Iβm joining a girls dance group. Iβm starting to train with the team of revamped South Coast Ladies this Wednesday. Once a week during the summer, increasing to twice a week from Autumn.
When Laleh told me that the girls group just started secret training I knew it was time for me to get back on that train. I love being on stage. I love dancing. I NEED exercise after putting on so much weight since I quit smoking in January!
I instantly messaged the lead girl asking if she would take me back to the team and her reply 1 minute later wasβ¦
βYESSSSS FUCK YEAH! Would love it xβ followed by βSorry I didnβt ask, thank Lalehβ followed by βI canβt deny that if we do a show, it will probably cause some drama that youβre in my team πβ.
I knewβ¦ the bollitics! Iβm ready for it!
Laleh and I screemed from happiness that weβll be training together again for good few minutes. It filled the car with a beautiful energy. It carried us forward smoothly to our destinationβ¦ Londonβs best dance floors. Despite the traffic, despite the underground closure, despite the closure of the sushi place we planned to visit.
Oh yeahβ¦ I also received this beautiful piece of art costume from Laleh for my birthday! I mean, how gorgeous is it? I do love shiny stuff and this is beauitfully hand made piece that will decorate my next Boom Town adventure π
And on the dancefloor? We squeezed every bit of happiness we could out of each dance we had. If there is one happy place in my life, itβs the dance floor. Thatβs where I thrive and fill myself up with precious lifeβs energy. Itβs all about the monents of connection like this oneβ¦ With music, with my soul, with my partner:
9 months ago I really couldnβt see myself reaching this place. It required a lot of conscious effort and solitude. It happened gradually. Little improvement with every change I implemented into my life. 2 steps forwards, 1 step back. 3 months ago it felt like I took 5 steps back. I fell back into unhealthy eating, whining, overwhelming guilt. I withdrew. I worried that another step forward wonβt happen again, that I wonβt find anymore strength.
I did. Another baby step. And another. Go out. Meet new people. Seek new experiences. I was really pushing myself. I continued to run every week. Run and leave the bad patterns behind. Despite getting heavier and every run being more challenging. Then the trip to Poland was literally a mile long step forward.
I realised that facing the challenges head on really helped. The lies I was telling myself, like Iβm happy. Iβm at peace. I wonder how life with surprise me today and the holly grail βI can handle this!β have slowly replaced the old thoughts of βIm a looser. I failed. Iβve had enough. Why so hard?β and the lies have slowly became my new reality.
Iβm happy.
Am I happy?
Am I really?
Yes, Iβm happy!
Can I be happy every day like this? When does it end?
For fuck sake Momo! Youβve been unhappy continuously for over a year now. You worked your ass off to get here. Just say fucking βThank you!β and enjoy! πππ
So I will. Fingers cross I will!
Happy 42nd birthday to me!
Until next time π
![](https://images.hive.blog/768x0/https://images.ecency.com/DQmTENTQg3Dffkp5ddMc3EqUKbAAwmgjLxVGbGpXVL2misF/fantagira_soft.png)
![](https://images.hive.blog/768x0/https://images.ecency.com/DQmTENTQg3Dffkp5ddMc3EqUKbAAwmgjLxVGbGpXVL2misF/fantagira_soft.png)
![](https://images.hive.blog/DQmQiFCxthP4NXJydcAjjKvGJKbYDUmJSrGhKVJbEWuQcKz/TheTerminal-2021-12.png)
![](https://images.hive.blog/768x0/https://images.ecency.com/DQmTENTQg3Dffkp5ddMc3EqUKbAAwmgjLxVGbGpXVL2misF/fantagira_soft.png)
Camera: | iPhone11 |
---|---|
Photographer: | @fantagira |
Happy birthday, my dear soul sister, Monica. I wish you all the best in the world. A big hug!
!LUV !HUG !LADY !PIZZA
View or trade
LOH
tokens.@pinkchic, you successfully shared 0.1000 LOH with @fantagira and you earned 0.1000 LOH as tips. (1/3 calls)
Use !LADY command to share LOH! More details available in this post.
Thank you my sis from another mother π Itβs the best bday weekend Iβve had in years π€©ππ
!ALIVE
!LADY
View or trade
LOH
tokens.@fantagira, you successfully shared 0.1000 LOH with @pinkchic and you earned 0.1000 LOH as tips. (1/4 calls)
Use !LADY command to share LOH! More details available in this post.
$PIZZA slices delivered:
pinkchic tipped fantagira
fantagira tipped ewkaw
@fantagira(1/5) tipped @cthings
jane1289 tipped fantagira
Hell yeah baby! Love the energy. Happy birthday! <3 Lots of hugs to you and keep rocking that attitude.
Thank you so much π Took a while to work my way back to it, but it was worth it to reach this happy place again ππ
!ALIVE
!LUV
Happy Birthday Dear enjoy your birthday with your family with good health and more blessings βΊοΈ
No family here, but theyβve all sent their wishes from a distance and Iβm lucky to have a bunch of amazing friends who are like a family to me π
Thank you for stopping by ππ
!LADY
View or trade
LOH
tokens.@fantagira, you successfully shared 0.1000 LOH with @preciousbree and you earned 0.1000 LOH as tips. (2/4 calls)
Use !LADY command to share LOH! More details available in this post.
Happy birthday to you @fantagira and I'm glad you found the happiness that you need. May you be blessed abundantly in all aspects of your life.
Thank you so much sis π I havenβt felt this positive in a very long time! π
!ALIVE
!LADY
View or trade
LOH
tokens.@fantagira, you successfully shared 0.1000 LOH with @jenthoughts and you earned 0.1000 LOH as tips. (3/4 calls)
Use !LADY command to share LOH! More details available in this post.
Happy Birthday to youuuuu! Dear what a vibrant post!π€©π
I wish you will be very happy and enjoy more the dancing moments!ππ
By the way, according to astrology, when you are 42 you live the big Uranus moment so maybe crazy times to change things, hope so... as I will be also included in some months!!! ππ
!LUV
!LOLZ
Thank you so much sis! I needed long time off to come back stronger and when the writing flows like this I know Iβm giving my best and everyone who reads it can feel it. I !love sharing good vibes π
So happy to be joining the dance team. Even more dance happiness for me this year π€©
Yeah, it feels very different this month. From that moment on the top of the mountain there has been a huge shift, lots of changes, things speeding up moving me forward into a beautiful flow that keeps getting better and better π₯°
I might need go to the forest to ground this beautiful energy or else Iβll fly away πππ !LOLZ
!ALIVE
Maybe nature is somehow magic, you got a lot of new energy!
!ALIVE
Yesss! I talked about this with my bestie and she said native Americans have this custom of sending young guys into the mountains once they become of age to βfind themselvesβ. The higher up the energies are also higher frequency and healing β€οΈβπ©Ή I need to go there every time Iβm in Poland next! π
!HUG
I sent 1.0 HUG on behalf of @duvinca.
(2/3)
Haaaapppy Birthday!!! πΈπΈ
This whole text is bursting with so much good energy I started to smile here too :D
Well done you!
Oh my! I missed being in such a flow! Those Polish mountains really did the trick and I love it when writing just pours out of me like this. So easily to spread those smile around when it happens π
Thank you Ewcia. Youβve been such an amazing online friend for me here all this time. My childhood friend who took me to the mountains is also Ewka ππ
!ALIVE
!PIZZA
Hahahah wszΔdzie Ewki :D
!LOLZ π
lolztoken.com
They were cooked in Greece.
Credit: belhaven14
@ewkaw, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of fantagira
(1/4)
OMG! π€© Just noticed this cutie now! It hasnβt flowered since I bought it in 2017. Such an awkwardly facing flower I didnβt know how to approach it for a pic π
![](https://images.hive.blog/768x0/https://images.ecency.com/DQmRjVMsd4H2UN3eZZnhu8JctMUX8Er3SGfa518xe8aUrzn/img_8057.jpg)
Oh wow! Very nice colour!
Is there more on the spike? Any fragrance?
It pretty amazing feeling when an orchid finally blooms. I have one since... 2016 I think and still nothing :p
The spike is full of buds, huge spike for a miniature, but I think some might dry up as I got pretty dry when I was in Poland.
I have others too that havenβt bloomed for years, but as long as they grow new leaves/bulbs I keep them around. There is hope! π
No fragrance sadly
!ALIVE
Thank you π
Congrats ππ what a remarkable year and turn around from where you were. So cool to see and it's all your own hard work and persistence. Great moves on the dancefloor too. I've only salsa'd a couple of times and am like a plank of wood.
I have picked this post on behalf of the @OurPick project! Check out our Reading Suggestions posts!
Please consider voting for our Liotes HIVE Witness. Thank you!
Oh mate, you actually have a good idea of my last years struggles. To get to this happier, healthier stage in my life is such a relief and still hard to believe that I reached that point. I thought it will never come π
Salsa is my life. If it wasnβt for dancing, I donβt know where would I be now. Itβs my true happy place π
Thank you so much for your support π
!ALIVE
!HUG
I sent 1.0 HUG on behalf of @fantagira.
(1/3)
100 lat zdrowia! :)
Dziekuje slicznie π
Happy birthday, Monika!
You had a nice day hiking and the beer as a reward is obligatory.
!ALIVE !BBH !HBIT
Thank you! That hike was truly magical, I swear π
!ALIVE
I believe that very much. Up in the mountains, it is somehow different than down in the valley. I was on the Zugspitze once and the climb was incredible.
Yesss! They say the energy is vibrating higher on those altitudes. Now I know what I need to do to feel better when Iβm down again ππ
Feeling !ALIVE
I turned 42 on Sat the 25th. Happy Birthday
You don't look like 42 Monika.. happiest birthday to you !LADY stay gorgeous and thriving hehe
!PIZZA
View or trade
LOH
tokens.@jane1289, you successfully shared 0.1000 LOH with @fantagira and you earned 0.1000 LOH as tips. (1/15 calls)
Use !LADY command to share LOH! More details available in this post.
A happy birthday π to you, !LUV many parts of your words got me smiling π I wish you many years ahead filled with good memories and happiness.
happy birthday π₯³
Happy Birthday
Oh wow, you are radiating with so much positive energy, I can feel it from here. β€οΈ
Glad things are working out well with you.
Happy 42nd! π₯³π°π₯
Happy Birthday! That's the spirit, seeing the glass half full is the way to go. And dance is one of the best things you can do! I hope to keep dancing salsa until I'm an oldie. π Cheers! !BEER
Happy birthday! Congratulations on getting back to happiness!
Thank you so much! Itβs been a while since I last felt this much energy coursing through my veins π
You don't need to wait for your birthday to treat yourself, do it every day! π Reading this made me smile. Happy birthday! β¨
Aww π₯° Thank you. That was the aim really. I love writing when it really flows from my heart. It has a good effect on everyone reading it π
!PIZZA
@tipu curate :)
Upvoted π (Mana: 65/75) Liquid rewards.
Dzieki slonce π
!LUV
So happy birthday π₯³
Thank you so much π
!HUG
I sent 1.0 HUG on behalf of @fantagira.
(1/3)
42? Who turned 42? The girl in the photo? The maximum is only 25.
Congratulations.
Aww π₯° Thatβs too sweet π Thank you so much! To be honest, after climbing that mountain I feel like Iβm 25 again! π
!LOLZ
lolztoken.com
Every judge knows bananas splits.
Credit: reddit
@apnigrich, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of fantagira
(2/4)
NEW: Join LOLZ's Daily Earn and Burn Contest and win $LOLZ
Happy belated birthday to you!! Such a lovely and positive post. It is good that you climb that mountain and returned full of joy and inspiration. Great to see you dancing in the video - forget the bollitics and just have fun. So happy for you as well @fantagira - you post will uplift every reader.
Aww π₯° Thank you Momo! I love writing when it flows as beautiful as it did that morning. Those mountains really did a trick on me. To think I almost didnβt go, cause I wanted to get a cheaper flight the day before π So glad I went!
Now with extra exercise I feel even more energetic and ready to conquer the daily life again π
!ALIVE
Happy belated birthday, dear Monika! ππΈ
I'm happy you feel renewed, with positive changes in your work environment and a lot of salsa π hehe.
Cheers π
Thank you Eli! Yeah, I feel like those mountains I claimed helped me push through my blockages and I feel much more positive finally π
Thank you for stopping by dear. Hope youβre well ππ
!ALIVE
Congratulations @fantagira! You received a personal badge!
Wait until the end of Power Up Day to find out the size of your Power-Bee.
May the Hive Power be with you!
You can view your badges on your board and compare yourself to others in the Ranking
Check out our last posts: