Be Yourself

Adapting to a new environment and culture can be difficult, especially when you feel like the people don’t understand you or appreciate your unique qualities. But even if certain people do make you feel excluded, it might be better for you to detach from them rather than stay resentful. Because being around others who think the same way as you will only make you feel like a stranger in your own skin. Being yourself might not always feel good. But being someone else isn’t always going to be easy either. Chances are that the people who won’t accept you as you already have their hands full with their own lives, too.

Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. ~ Oscar Wilde

Speak up

If you’re in a situation where you feel like you’re being excluded by others, it might be helpful to take a step back and think through your feelings before you start speaking about them to others. Ask yourself if you really want to bring the issue up in conversation. When you speak up, you might feel like you’re prying into other people’s lives, which can be nerve-wracking. But you don’t have to worry about keeping other people’s feelings in mind when you’re speaking up. And if you do feel nervous about it, try speaking up in a supportive, nonchalant tone.

Be confident

When you’re out at a party with your friends and you feel like someone is ignoring you, try to remember that no one is interested in you more than your closest friends are. If a random person starts to pay more attention to you than they do to your friends, try to remind yourself that they’re just being friendly. Your friends might be preoccupied with their own conversations and watching the people around them, and they might not even realize that you’re feeling left out. When you’re confident, you’ll seem more interesting to others. And when you’re interesting, you’ll seem less like someone who needs to be included.

Don't let others' opinions control you.

If you’re often bothered by how other people act or what they have, it might be helpful to remember that other people’s opinions about you don’t matter as much as how you view yourself. As long as you feel good about who you are, it’s okay if other people aren’t interested in you.

Count to 10 and breathe deeply

When you feel like you’re being excluded by others, it might be helpful to take a few deep breaths and count to ten. You might even find it helpful to do some simple visualization techniques while you’re counting to ten. Visualization techniques are often thought of as just for relaxation, but they’re actually useful for managing your emotions too. They help you to get a better handle on your thoughts by reminding you that your mind doesn’t always have to be filled with negative, resentful thoughts. You can also use visualization to remind yourself that you’re stronger than you might feel.

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