Hive Naija Weekly Prompts | Edition 32 ~ The Responsibility keeps coming
Hello beautiful people of #hive-naija, how are you all doing? I have been down since yesterday and still am but I just had to be strong today, I had the intention of answering this prompt yesterday but for some reason, I couldn't. I was psychologically and mentally stressed and it was beginning to affect me health-wise, so I decided that I needed a break because I knew writing this was going to require my brain to be functioning and I wasn't up for that.
So this week's prompt says;
There have been times when we have been prompted to step up and assume responsibility. It may be in our personal or professional lives. Tell us about a time you were required to step into a phase of leadership - no matter how brief the moment. Was it difficult? Did you adapt?
I was okay yesterday until I talked with someone, the truth is when he talks the way he does, it hurts me because eh, I have assumed this responsibility role since I was fifteen years old in Senior Secondary School One and I am currently close to my thirties and I am still assuming this role, and the truth is it is difficult, depressing, tiring, exhausting, and mentally, psychological, emotionally and physically draining. People who do not know where the shoe hurt and have never been in that position will never understand.
For fourteen years or more, I have assumed the role of the breadwinner in my family, something I wish I didn't have to do at my young age, but then, death took the only person who was our breadwinner, someone would think that since its been years I should have adapted to the responsibility role but NO, I have not adapted, if anything I need a break from everything.
When there is a challenge, everyone leaves it for me to carry the whole challenge on my head and solve it or settle it alone, without lending a helping hand because I have been doing it, so I should do it because they have their life and bills to take care of.
I had to assume the role because I loved my family and I didn't want my younger ones to miss the absence of our father and didn't want my mom to take up the responsibility herself but I guess that was part of the mistake of my life because it gets tougher every day.
You know, what I did, I practically, took up the responsibility of taking care of my family and forgoing my life in the process, I forgot I existed and lived my life for them because I promised in my heart to do everything within my power to make sure they were happy even when we lost my dad.
Every day a new responsibility is thrown at me and everyone forgets that I am human too and need a shoulder to lean on when I am at my lowest, they forget that I also need them to call and check up on me too, not me doing everything, especially on days when you fail. I pick myself up, clean myself up, encourage myself, and continue my walk all by myself. Some days I just wish I could get a rest from everything because it is exhausting and depressing.
Every day, I wake up not just thinking about myself but thinking about my family because eh, they are all looking at me for one thing or the other even when they know how tight it had been for me ever since I got admission, and lost my job in the process because my classes were clashing with my job time, they don't consider how hectic it is being a sole responsibility for everything that concerns my life and then there's too.
Victor AD sang;
Phone dey ring
Na family dey call oh
If no be billing na something dey sup oh
Anyhow e be omo money is involve oh
The funny thing is many still do have this mentality, especially in this country that as the first child, you have to step up and assume that responsibility without even thinking of the many effects it can have on you. Sometimes I am just afraid, I am supposed to be used to all of these but I am not because it is draining, I wish I could adapt but I can't, we all know there will be more coming as a "First child" of a family as we keep growing and eventually marry, the responsibility keeps coming.
This is my entry to Hive Naija Weekly Prompts | Edition 32
Hmmm It's well
Tough read. It's really sad what you're passing through at q young age. Having such responsibility on your shoulders can be heavy. Stay strong,one day it's all going to turn out fine.
Yay! 🤗
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You're a superhero @eliany. It's not easy assuming the role you have taken in your family. It comes with a lot of pressure, but you have been brave. Kudos!
Thank you, this comment is much appreciated 🤗
I have noticed that the numbers of young women. Stepping up to fill their fathers shoes is increasing. You’re a strong woman and this experience is definitely moulding you and bring out the best. Trust the process darling
That is true, but the funny thing is the society hasn't still eradicated the thought of the father's property is meant for the male only even when they know that daily the number of young women stepping into the breadwinner responsibility is quite increasing unlike that of men.
Thank you for the comment, I appreciate it
I will start by wishing a stronger health. This is why, as a man, I have been praying for a girl child. The love of a woman to her family can't be quantified. They take up responsibilities to fill any void in the family. They are ready to sacrifice their comfort for the betterment of others.
I bump into someone complaining bitterly yesterday that she is frustrated for not having a male child. I laughed at his orientation about life.
I am using this medium to say kudos to you for loving your family so much. I pray that your plan and wish for them shall materialize.
You have to communicate with them and let them know that for a greater future, you need to invest in yourself and that's what you are doing through your education. If there any way you can show your younger ones the way to step up their efforts in working to make money, fine, try and do that.
I wish you better days ahead. Cheers!!!