Reflection: I Was a “Misfit” — But What Does That Actually MEAN?

Starting around teenagehood, I think pretty much everyone likes to think they're a “misfit” at one time or another. Whether it's just a case of experimenting with self-identity or maybe something deeper, it's a pretty common experience.

But what do we really mean when we call ourselves ”misfits,” or when we call somebody else a ”misfit?”

Whereas I have often thought of myself as a misfit, during most of my late teens and early adulthood it was little more than a way to "label" a vague sense of not fitting in. I never actually took the time to sit down and put my finger on exactly what gave rise to these feelings.

As I've aged — and now I've rounded 60 years of age — I'm still aware that I am a misfit in many ways but what has changed is that I've made peace with the way I am quietly accepting as being a reality.

So once again, what does it actually mean to be a ”misfit?”

The closest I can come to some kind of summary is that you feel like a misfit when almost all the things that are important to you and excite you seem to mean absolutely nothing to anybody else... and the things that are meaningful and exciting to other people seem relatively or totally meaningless to you.

Think about that, for a moment.

Along the way, one of the things I've noticed is that the occasional fellow misfit I've encountered tends to have in common with me that they don't really care about what we might call majority opinion or the majority paradigm. They feel little to no compulsion to succumb to the sense of peer pressure that often is associated with statements like ”MOST people like/say/do.”

”What do you mean you don't like ice cream? EVERYBODY likes ice cream!”

That was one of the ones one of my fellow misfits always complained about having to deal with, all the time.

In many ways, humans are very tribal or herd-like animals. In most cases, we are suspicious of likes, dislikes and behavior that doesn't fall within the generally accepted spectrum of herd consensus.

You end up being a misfit when you're willing to throw ”herd consensus” out the window and establish your own paradigms purely based on what you think feels and tastes and sounds right.

That doesn't mean — necessarily — that you don't check in with the world to see what else exists out there, but you’re not easily swayed by the fact that ”everyone else” thinks something is a good idea... and you wouldn't touch it with the proverbial 10-foot pole.

Mostly, though, the effect is very subtle. It's the fact that you'll never hear the music you like on any radio station, anywhere. It's unlikely you'll ever see your favorite movies at a movie theater. Your favorite restaurants keep going out of business and getting replaced with the 43rd Mexican food place in town. You can't find another pair of your favorite shoes, because they were the ones discontinued because they didn't sell.

A footnote, before I wrap this up. I was never trying to be contrarian; in fact, I sincerely tried not to be a misfit for a couple of decades. Just didn't work very well... so I stopped.

Thanks for reading, and have a great weekend!

How about YOU? Have you ever felt like a misfit? WHAT exactly made you feel that way? Did your tastes gradually change, or was it simply who you were? Are we ultimately ALL misfits? Comments, feedback and other interaction is invited and welcomed! Because — after all — SOCIAL content is about interacting, right? Leave a comment — share your experiences — be part of the conversation!

---

Greetings bloggers and social content creators! This article was created via PeakD, a blogging application that's part of the Hive Social Content Experience. If you're a blogger, writer, poet, artist, vlogger, musician or other creative content wizard, come join us! Hive is a little "different" because it's not run by a "company;" it operates via the consensus of its users and your content can't be banned, censored, taken down or demonetized. And that COUNTS for something, in these uncertain times! So if you're ready for the next generation of social content where YOU retain ownership and control, come by and learn about Hive and make an account!

Proud member of the Silver Bloggers Community on Hive!

(As usual, all text and images by the author, unless otherwise credited. This is original content, created expressly and uniquely for this platform — NOT cross posted anywhere else!)
Created at 20220211 15:10 PST
0497/1743