Moderation is a necessity in discipline and affection towards our kids
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Judging with the past, when i was a teacher.......I am a kind of person that does not like using iron hand on my pupils nor do i spare the rod when it is needed... I believe things are better when balanced, there is time to be strict and there is time to discipline....
The disadvantage of being too mean with children is that it makes some fearless while it makes some fearful, it depends on the child while sparing the rod and making them do what they want and have their way all the time will also tell on such kids behaviour....
I got tired of teaching when the no beating rules was introduced and i didn't succumb to that rule until i stopped teaching, many times the proprietress will ransack my class in search of canes but that does not stop me from getting another one.... I don't really use the cane on the kids but having it around makes them act accordingly knowing if they misbehave, it could be used on them..
Few days after the rule was introduced in my school, i see some pupils already misbehaving with their teachers and one teacher even got tired and brought the boy to me, he cooperated when he get to my class since he knows what i am capable of....
I love my pupils, we interact like family, more like siblings and the teachers always be like, master bolaji and his kids lol.... They have their own impact in my life too because i spent so much time with them that i started feeling like a baby too, but it still doesn't change the fact that i will discipline them if they go overboard and they know that and always keep themselves in check, not always but most time and whenever they misbehave, i bring out Mr DO GOOD
I heard a story of a one eyed man, he was not born blind, it happened during his childhood days and till he died he blamed his mum for it...
It was during his childhood days, he was playing with a stick, the neighbour who realized how dangerous it is collected the stick from him and he started crying only for the mother to collect the stick and gave it back to him..
Few minutes later, while driving his stick motor, somehow the pointed part of the stick went into his eyes and that was how he lost his one eye forever....
When he grew older, it was difficult for him to get married as ladies do not want a one eyed man,he was so tired of everything and he confronted his mother and ask why she had to give him back the stick, the mother said it was because she did not want him to cry..
He said you should have allowed me to cry, it won't have lasted more than an hour but now i cry every single day of my life because of that day...
Unfortunately the man ended up killing his mother and also commited sucide as he was not happy with life....
I do not have my own child yet but when i have one in the future, it will be a mixture of love and discipline, i will use my right hand to discipline her when she do something wrong and use the other hand to pet her....
No mercy when it comes to discipline if she does something that deserves it, so the child can be grateful in the future.... I received a lot of floggings from my mother and i can see the result of those things in my life now.....
I am not saying i will flog my kids, there are many ways to discipline a child without using cane but if cane is a necessity, i won't hesitate to use it!
I am not sparing any rod!
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Not sparing the rod which could bring temporary pain is better than sparing the rod and causing everlasting and permanent pain to such a child. Just like the one-eyed man, he could have felt the pain for a few minutes if his mom had collected the stick from him. Parents need to understand the importance of balancing love and discipline. When you scold a child with the right hand, you embrace the child with the left hand and that is how it should be.
I have determined and decided to use the book of Proverbs in training my kids because there are lot of wisdom on how to parent a child.
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When you scold a child with the right hand, you embrace the child with the left hand and that is how it should be.I love this and that is what the woman refuse to do which cost her and the son a lot
Such a pity!
Imagine the sad story due one single act of indiscipline to the child by his mother .. it's quite unfortunate. Spare the rod and spoil the child is a statement every parents should act upon to avoid regrets later in the future..from your story, you were also a disciplinarian to your students and I don't have any doubt about your plans on your future kids.
Thanks for participating 👍
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thanks nkem, yea it is a sad story with a sad ending.....
I also went to this kind of school where the teachers are not allowed to beat us
We were so spoilt and it was not helpful
yea, it just won't work, even though i know it is because of some teachers harshness that made them come up with such rule
Applying discipline in school or at home can be a challenge for teachers and parents. As you stated discipline does not necessarily have to be corporal punishment and one will decide when and if it is needed.
The mother who did not take the stick from the child is simply negligent. Mistakes can be made but common sense is a basic requirement for child care.
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i guess too much love for the kid blinded her, she regret her decision too
Yes true
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I trust you, not sparing any rod, balance remains the perfect way in raising children. Imagine the character change when the no cane rule was applied, they will become so spoilt and the teachers frustrated. Children will always misbehave, we should know when to use the rod, not all times though.
yea, fear need to be created in them so they can be at their best behaviour but they must be loved too so the fear do not eat them up/
This is sad.
If only the mother understood that not granting a child's wish doesn't make you an unloving parent.
yea, she didn't want him to cry and end up ruining his future
Personally, I think there are more.effect ways to teach a child some discipline and bring them up well. Many times, the children don't see beyond the flogging, and therefore they may resent people.
I like your method—mixing love and discipline. Drawing them close makes it easier to correct them.