Sharing financial details and Finances as spouses good or bad? (LOH# 145)

It's sad that it turned bad for her. The husband was too selfish by not discussing with her about the dowry and it's their money which should be useful for both of them not the extended family

For a car as dowry to his sister? That doesn't guarantee him taking from the money he kept together with his wife especially without her permission, too bad really!

Thanks for participating sis.

I guess there are a couple of different ways to look at it. My wife and I have separate bank accounts but we each have the other's name on the account too so it could be accessed if needed. But I look at it this way: If you can't trust your spouse, you probably shouldn't be married to them.

Oh how I would wish the husband would bring the 'Need' up with his wife rather than keeping it to himself and damaging the trust between them. Personally, I built some emergency savings for ONLY two purposes; Emergency home repair and Health Emergencies. No one else outside my family knows of it.
Thanks for sharing @biyaawnur

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Hello @biyaawnur. You present an interesting case in support of your opinion that finances between spouses should be kept separate. In the case of the couple you mention, more communication and shared values should have been discussed before starting to save the money for a specific purpose. A threshold should have been set for allowable expenditures. Anything above, would have to be agreed upon. My thoughts are to always take care of your immediate family first. Then you can consider the needs of others, including family members.

The situation can go both ways. I don't feel there is a need for a separate account if both parties agree upon financial rules in the beginning. Of course, monthly expenses come first. Then spending on other items.

I would be extremely upset, say for instance, if saving for an expensive vacation or a necessary household item, then when the time came, the money was spent, and I was not informed. That is a break of trust.

It's all about communication.

I'm not saying that separate accounts should not be entered into. If the couple agree to this, then it is there relationship agreement.

I once knew a couple who had separate accounts. Both split the monthly expenses in half. When one spouse spent recklessly on undisclosed gambling and bills were not met, the other spouse grew angry. And rightly so. In any event, the other spouse paid the electricity bill. How were they to divide who would use the electricity when arguments ensued afterward. Eventually, the couple divorced. In that case, one spouse did not uphold his expected trust.

Thanks for sharing this story. A thoughtful read.

Take care and have a good weekend.

!ALIVE

Hello @biyaawnur. I also wanted to bring to your attention the images you included in your post. You indicate that the images were taken from Pixabay. There is no direct link in your post to any of the images. This is required so that the images can be verified to have been taken from a site gives permission to use the images for commercial purposes.

Thanks for your attention to this matter.