The university career is the decision of...
When I was a little girl and throughout my growth my mother always asked me what career I would like to study, what they were, my tastes and inclinations; as a child it seemed something quite trivial, but as I grew up the conversations also deepened and I understood my mother's reasons to encourage me to think about it.
The reason why my mother always asked me about it, was because she studied a career that although it is very nice, it was not of her complete liking, which led her not to finish it, she studied it because my grandmother wanted it, that is to say it was not her vocation, it was not that she was really passionate about it.
I want to make it clear that up to a certain age parents are the ones who decide, for example, a young child can not and should not decide whether or not to go to school, if it had been for me I would not have attended school, but my mother forced me not only to attend, she taught me sometimes talking sometimes with a spanking to carry a notebook correctly to read, interpret, investigate to be responsible, just to mention a few.
from PxHere
I will not deny that sometimes I felt that I hated my mother when she made me study a thousand times the multiplication tables, when she made me do calligraphy to improve my handwriting or to learn how to write a word correctly, but when it was time to choose my college career my mother always insisted that the decision was mine and by that time as I do now I am grateful that she imposed her will because it was for my welfare and at that age I really did not know what I wanted.
So the guidance to choose was not lacking based on what she noticed I was passionate about, on my virtues and strengths, on the limitations or fears that she also knew about her daughter and the motivation to let me know that whatever I proposed with determination, discipline and perseverance I could achieve it.
So basically I do not think it is right, nor necessary for parents to decide on the university careers of their children and much less on their personal lives when they are adults, made and rights, maybe they are wrong, but it is their right to choose.
from PxHere
To exemplify I have the case of a friend whose mother chose her husband, she as an obedient daughter got married, but her marriage ended in failure first because although she had been a girlfriend of that man, she was not really in love with him and secondly this man got tired of cheating on her with other women, even to the point of calling her on the phone to torment her.
The interference of my friend's mother in her life was so much that when she was already married and had a son, her mother wanted her grandson to study in the school that she thought best, but little by little my friend was able to take the courage and start making decisions that only she could make.
In conclusion, there are ages in which parents take the baton, the control because in childhood and adolescence and even in part of adulthood if our children continue under our roof there are rules that must continue to abide by because it is our home, but there are other issues in which as parents we must respect their decisions and one of them is their choice of college career, so I say goodbye to my participation in the proposed topic for October 21 of Monthly Prompts | October INLEO
Cuando era una niña pequeña y a lo largo de mi crecimiento mi madre siempre me pregunto qué carrera me gustaría estudiar, cuáles eran, mis gustos e inclinaciones; de niña me parecía algo bastante trivial, pero al ir creciendo las conversaciones también profundizaron y comprendí las razones de mi madre para animarme a pensar en ello.
El motivo por el que mi madre siempre me preguntaba sobre el tema, era porque ella estudió una carrera que si bien es muy bonita, no era de su completo agrado, lo que llevo a que no la terminara, ella la estudió porque mi abuela lo quiso, es decir no era su vocación no era que realmente la apasionara.
Deseo dejar claro que hasta cierta edad los padres son los que deciden, por ejemplo, un niño pequeño no puede ni debe decidir si va o no a la escuela, si por mí hubiera sido no hubiera asistido a la escuela, pero mi madre me obligo y no solo a asistir, me enseñó a veces conversando a veces con una nalgada a llevar de forma correcta un cuaderno a leer, interpretar, investigar a ser responsable, por solo mencionar algunos.
No negaré que a veces sentía que detestaba a mi madre cuando me hacía estudiar mil veces las tablas de multiplicar, cuando me hacía caligrafías para mejorar mi letra o para aprender a escribir correctamente una palabra, pero ya al momento de elegir mi carrera universitaria mi madre siempre insistió en que la decisión era mía y ya para ese momento como lo hago ahora agradezco que ella impusiera su voluntad porque era por mi bienestar y a esa edad de verdad no sabía lo que quería.
Así que la orientación para elegir no faltó basándose en lo que ella notaba me apasionaba, en mis virtudes y fortalezas, en las limitaciones o miedos que también conocía de su hija y la motivación para hacerme saber que todo lo que me propusiera con empeño, disciplina y perseverancia podría lograrlo.
Por lo que básicamente no creo correcto, ni necesario el que los padres decidan sobre las carreras universitarias que sus hijos y mucho menos sobre su vida personal cuando ya son adultos, hechos y derechos, tal vez se equivoquen, pero es su derecho elegir.
Por ejemplificar tengo el caso de una amiga a la que su madre le eligió el esposo, ella como hija obediente se casó, pero su matrimonio termino en fracaso primero porque aunque si había sido novia de ese hombre, no estaba enamora de él realmente y segundo este señor se cansó de engañarla con otras mujeres, incluso llegaron hasta a llamarla por teléfono para atormentarla.
Era tanta la intromisión de la madre de mi amiga en su vida, que ya estando casada y teniendo un hijo, su madre quiso y logro que su nieto estudiara en el colegio que a ella mejor le pareció, pero poco a poco mi amiga logro tomar el valor y empezar a tomar las decisiones que solo a ella le competían.
Terminando, existen edades en las que los padres llevamos la batuta, el control porque en la infancia y a la adolescencia e incluso en parte de la vida adulta si nuestros hijos continúan bajo nuestro techo hay reglas que deberán continuar acatando porque es nuestra casa, pero hay otros temas en los que como padres debemos respetar sus decisiones y una de ellas es su elección de carrera universitaria, de este modo me despido de mi participación en el tema propuesto para el día 21 de octubre de Monthly Prompts | octubre INLEO
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I wholeheartedly agree with you. There are some decisions that can’t be left to the kids. Indeed, parents keep us in line
That's right, today I am grateful for many of the decisions my mother made for me and also for the way she guided me to study not one but two university degrees.
I think parent making decisions for their children is a good thing because some children fail to realize their passion and vision early.
If as adults we sometimes do not know what we want, imagine a child in full growth and formation process.
Like you stated, our parents could be right. Sometimes, in trying to protect us, they end up over protecting which ends up taking our freedom. The most important thing is to be mindful of this and have your own boundaries.
To a certain extent and depending on the age, they may let us choose some things, but the parents' experience guides them on many, many issues