Partner love in the life of @actioncats (my experience) (ENG/ SPA)

We are all born with that desire and need for love, as wisely described in the publication, which invites us to write about this topic, we feel love for family, friends, pets, without forgetting our own love, but this time we are invited to write a few lines about our experience in terms of love as a couple, I could write a book.

I have commented what follows in previous publications, but it is essential to repeat it to give a complete context of my experience, I do not remember exactly how old I was when my father left home for the first time, but like every girl he was my first love, but I did not have him at home and spent the time focused on himself, it is still so and that somehow left traces in me, because I am convinced that for a long time that lack marked my life as a couple.

Thus, I went through my first relationships in which I do not know why everything was a tragedy or a problem, I think partly because of sentimental immaturity, for example after the breakup with my first boyfriend I fell into a terrible depression, I hardly left my bed, barely ate and only cried, fortunately I got out of bed, but I did not change some patterns and my relationships went from bad to worse.

Besides, there was a kind of self-destruction in me, good men and good relationships were, to call it somehow, boring, I liked those who were not good and you can imagine what kind of relationships I had, in a word terrible, the worst of all was one of four years with a college classmate, he somehow noticed my lack of love, my skinny side and manipulated me as he wanted, I practically begged for love, we fought a lot, terrible fights, where his words were equal or worse than if he hit me, because everything he told me was extremely painful for me, but thanks to the words of family and a space friend who confronted me on several occasions and that I was getting tired of the situation and I realized that this relationship was not a healthy one, so I ended up with him.

Although my next relationships were better, something was still wrong, I simply had to work on myself, because I could not give what I did not have and at some point simply spend time alone, because I did not want to be with someone just to be, I wanted a real relationship, where it was not just about physical attraction, or a crush that is passing if it is not strengthened with more, if it is not nurtured.

Now, although in theory I had thought or decided that better alone than bad company, I met in a job for Professional Fees, who today in my dear fat man, ironically at first I did not like him at all, hahaha, but then we were trying and little by little we were falling in love and soon will be three years together, like any relationship is not perfect, but I feel that here the effort is together, sometimes we fight, I think we would be aliens if that did not happen, But we managed to talk and turn the page soon, I think this is something very necessary in any relationship, forgive, forget, do not make a tragedy out of a stupid thing and always talk about what we like and what we do not like, support each other and be aware that the person who is in front of you, will not become what you want, that is, is not moldable to how you want him or her to be, could do some things and change, but is someone with his or her own thoughts and ideas.

Likewise, since I understood that love is more than an emotion, butterflies in the stomach, a fever, it is a decision, yes a decision, to be with someone with all that is good about that person, with his virtues, his defects, with his snoring, with that character and manners that are very likely to worsen over the years, there everything changed, I stopped seeing love as something to suffer and began to see it from other angles, everything changed. Fulvio and I are still building and we still have a long way to go, but we support each other in everything, there are still aspects to work on, but one step at a time.